Saturday, October 14th, 2000
11:15a quietness
what do u think of this? :
www.quietpc.com
a place that has gadgets to make your pc QUIET!
woke up 4 a sec...think
i'll go back 2 bed now 4 a bit
11:39a ok, i didn't go back 2 bed. i'm cleaning a bit. now i'm gonna call
my mom and dad and say hi and see how they are doing
12:03p i bought some toe socks :)
does anyone know where
i could buy all the episodes of northern exposure on video tape?
1:54p i had such a great day yesterday. i was gonna go walking around taking
polaroids...but i stopped at the sandwhich shop first to visit my friend bill
2 tell him about the dnap stock and also get some food. so i got some food
and then i went on errands with him. one of the places we went was a mexican
food store. god! all the food in there looked so yummy! big deli! and i got
to buy a bunch of those catholic/mexican/religious candles. u know the ones
that have the virgin mary on the front and stuff? and u write your request
on the candle? LOVE THOSE. and they were only 1.59 a piece :)
i remember when urban outfitters were selling them for 6 bucks a piece or
something. god.
and i bought a pink elephant pinnata! but it's at the sandwhich shop for awhile as decoration.
then i went for a walk
and this building i've been wanting to get into for 2 years was finally open!
i freaked and ran in and wanted to take a ton of photos but everyone didn't
loook like they were gonna let me.
more on that later!
then i went back to the
sandwhich place and helped bill with the shop. and i drew a sign for them
that said how much their food costs and what they have and stuff.
and i took a bunch of polaroids in there.
then i had to run home and get back by 7 'cause i was gonna go out 2 sushi with his best friend/boss and his wife emmie. yummmmmmmm
anyway..i could go on and on about the details of yesterday but i just don't have time 'cause i wanna get outside again before it gets dark out. it's the last of the nice weather. it was 70 degrees out yesterday and today it's 60 degrees.
4 more hours of sunlight. gotta get dressed and all that. and i'm gonna go out and explore.
i am making a huge effort to go outside and get exercaise.
i have been so very social
lately..it's odd. very odd. but it's a nice change of pace :)
and i have an incredible amount of energy and enthusiasm. maybe almost TOO
much :)
but i know what it is
that is making me this way. prozac.
i had a few extras that i have saved from when i was on prozac years and years
ago.
and i know that my psychiatrist might be reading this, and if he is! hi! sorry to be self medicating! ack!
i have been seeing him for 13 years! ( about twice a year at the least...once every 2 months at the most. once i went for several years without seeing him )
he is groovy , he looks like john denver. and he is always at this same level of calmness. i don't know how he does it. the only thing i know about him is that he is an aquarious and he likes unusual ties.
anyway...who knows what the adverse effects are of taking xanax, amitriptyline, neurontin, and seroquel and prozac are. but i feel the best i've felt in ages. and i am going out and actually being really really social and LIKING it! and i am walking down roads with almost no fear in me. when i see scary people on the street i don't cower. i feel really confidant. i feel really damn good. it's so great to feel like this.
oh ya...also doxepin..i had some left over of those , too. 'cause prozac geeks me out so much...i am so not tired at night. so sometimes i take some doxepin to make me sleep.
wow. ok, so go ahead and
yell at me about how stupid i am. whatever.
all i know is i am sleeping at night, and i am waking up at a reasonable social
hour, i am going outside and interacting with people with no fear. and i'm
not drinking.
i mean, that really incredible. so there u have it.
however, i do not mean
to be good example here. i don't recommend that anyone mix drugs like i do.
i know it can be dangerous. i know i'm being reckless. u don't need 2 preach
2 me the dangers. i know i know.
don't do this at home kids. consult your physician first.
2:00p oh no...my livejournal is freaking out on me again...and i cannot see
any posts i make just like the other day. argh.
yep...i am in my isp's
cache again. blarg. i wonder how long that will last. i hope not all day like
it did the last time!
2:01a let ralph debate
what's the deal with this "let ralph debate" thing?
there is a sign on the refrigerator at the sandwhich shop that says that.
i had no idea what it meant.
then radiohead whenh they were on saturday night live...thom york (sp?) held up a "let ralph debate" sign!
god, i wish i had taped radiohead tonight on SNL.
did anyone tape it? and if so could u make a copy of it for me? it was so intense, i can't believe that i didn't tape it! *hits myself over the head*
wow. truly amazing. i
can't believe that the radiohead record is #1 in america right now!
it's SO not "pop" it's really pretty way out there.
i took a lot of groovy pix on my polaroid today. i have so many 2 scan in and put in an anagram.
and then there's ernie, the 81 year old artist guy/thing. i can't believe i let him in my house. wow. what a character. more on that later...'cause i want 2 take a lot of time explaining him :)
me tired now. me go 2
bed.
me 2 tired 2 drag 50 pound camera into bedroom.
8:50a hey, i'm on my teensy little 1st computer in the thing room connected
at 33.3 using aol. ack. i found some connectors i bought for phone cords and
connected up 3 gigantic phone cords and i'm running them down the hall over
2 the kitchen sink, where the phone lines are:)
god, i forgot how painstakingly slow it is to be connected this way! wow!
DSL kicks ass! even tho it is sometimes unreliable.
i should go 2 some flash sites and see how long things take 2 load there.
maybe it's good i don't have my site done in flash, just so it can load better
for people with modems.
i gotta get my wireless one working again. i have 2 buy a new modem for it.
but that is 400 bucks.
i was going 2 go 2 a concert with my dad today at 3, but i really don't feel
like it...so i cancelled. i just wanna putz about the house today and clean
and stuff. i've been pretty social for awhile now, so today i'd like 2 stay
home.
i'm still in the cache
from my regular isp, so that's why i'm typing 2 u using aol.
but i have 2 disconnect this computer if i want 2 use my phone.
i think i will buy radiohead's
new cd today. and madonna's
12:50p yay! i can get back 2 my livejournal now using my regular dsl computer!
:)
it's only 54 degrees outside :(
quite dufferent than the lovely 60-70 degree weather we had here last week
:(
but i am thinking i should still get outside 2 enjoy it since it will soon be freezing temperatures..and 54 degrees is still at a comfortable temp as long as u wear a coat and hat.
i also need 2 scan all the polaroids i've been taking lately. i have 2 scan each one separately and then fiddle with the contrasts and brightness and all that jazz in order for it 2 turn out not looking muddy. i have discovered that my scanner sucks when it comes to scanning polaroids..and i don't know why...they just turn out really dull and muddy looking unless i tweak them. my scanner does not scan tru 2 life. anyone know what is the GOD of scanners? it'd be cool if i knew what scanner was the best. mine is a vista scan or something.
time 2 dance around my
livingroom for a bit and shake off my grogginess and my slight headache
1:07p gary numan
i am taping the three gary numan albums i have, for bill
i love gary numan :)
6:58p today i've been organizing and cleaning. and i paid more bills. went
through VHS cassettes that were unmarked and marked them. i always end up
throwing blank cassettes in a moments notice into the vcr and then not labelling
them. i have some cool movies that i taped that i haven't watched yet..one
being Vernon, Florida and another called "the cream will rise" which
is a documentary on sophie b. hawkins.
and i am sending out 2
the universe huge openness 2 all possibilities on how to get this 500,000
condo that is my dream house. i know i would liev there until i die. i know
i would create beautiful things there. i know i could be at peace. it is mine.
there si no other possibility. i love it...it loves me. we WILL be together.
i know it, i feel it in my heart. somehow, someway...
money must manifest now in my life rapidly in alimitless possibility way.
i am open to all channels, options, possibilities. i want it more than anything.
it is my home.