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it's rather silly that i am even writing in here because i have absolutely nothing to say. or more accurate would be to say i have TOO much to say and don't have the energy to type it! all i did today is read stuff on the net. right now i'm in the middle of reading veronika's journal which is at www.iloveveronika.com she is so funny and wonderful , the way she writes. i wish she hadn't disappeared off the face of the planet months ago to leave a website behind...still up..curious! the other thing i read for HOURS is all the stories at www.ampulove.com now THAT is some serious compelling and disturbing shit! i couldn't peel my eyes away nor can i digest it! i have way too much to say. my brain is imploding. it all started this way: so, i am looking for pictures of the woman who runs with those cool robotic legs. she was on oprah today and they showed some cool pictures of her that were super cyber, one was from I.D. magazine... and i came across THIS site, which is definitely one of the weirdest i have ever seen!and with that midi music! http://ni3d.homestead.com/devotee/devotee.html i have too much to say about this so my mind is imploding. i can't even say it! must digest. i am compelled to look, i am disturbed, i am intrigued i love it's surrealness. i think it's beautiful. but i don't think i'm thinking like MOST people who are into that are thinking..at least i don't think so anyway. i liked dressing up as a pirate when i was a kid and having a hook and one eye. this one guy that used to work at a club i used to frequent had this wooden leg that i thought was so cool. but that wasn't what first drew me to him. he was just a cool mellow guy. one of those guy guys of the good kind. cigarette smoking, blue jeans, boots. he sold me my first gun. anyway...i liked his wooden leg 'cause i thought it had a neat pirate swashbuckling quality. then my wanting a cyberarm. i never put all three of these incidents together as being anything in common. well, perhaps they don't have anything in common. i don't think they really do. i just like unique cool things whether they be an old stuffed animal i find or a special jar or rock on the beach. i've always been attracted to the unusual and odd. i liked the movie "freaks" i could relate. but reading the stories on www.ampulove.com wow i'll have to get the urls to the most compelling ones and put them here..but i think they all were better than a stephen king novel ( not that i ever read one ) *brain fizzles* i'm looking at vera little's links and found:
http://pygmalion.mda.or.jp
on an entirely DIFFERENT subject, i am going to a conference in febuary and here is the website about it: www.shout2000.com do u think it will be as cool as it sounds? i hope so! i am excited! i am going to be on a panel called "cam clan" charity, courtney, jenni and jodi are going to. i'm nervous! has anyone of u ever been to anything like this before? and here's something i've just started, only about 7 people have signed up so far but i think it's gonna be very cool! anaverse station: Posted
by ANA on January 05, 2000 at 14:45:37: and about the broken hello kitty mug, i found one on ebay and was the winning bidder! :) and
some books i bought recently( they were all about 4 to 6 bucks a piece
:) and here's a rant i went on about sexuality and marketing ( a rant? from me? noooo ) Posted by ANA on January 05, 2000 at 00:14:12: In
Reply to: Sexuality and Marketing on January 04, 2000 at 18:46:35: but in the case of my cd...it's not like i said to myself, " hmm, i think i will put a picture of a pretty naked woman on my cd to help to sell it!" because..ummm...i AM the pretty naked woman and it's my record and i wrote the songs, it only makes sense that i would also be on my cover like other artists get to be! so i'm pretty ..so i'm naked...so i write songs..so these three thing happened to coincide at the exact time and place when these things would be popular in advertising. let
me make it perfectly clear that i was the "mastermind" behind
that cover..the sets, the props, the colours, the hair, the make up,
who i chose as photographer, what i chose to wear or not wear! i
am just SO sick of people thinking that there is a guy behind me telling
me what to do. and when i decided to do an electronic more dance oriented cd, then it was "all bobby's z's master plan" because he was from prince and the revolution ( bobby z, my manager and producer ) like i can't make a decision on my own? one of my other friends STILL insists that anavoog.com sucks, in his opinion, because he thinks bobby z wrecked my "sound" which i never even HAD a sound. all my albums are radically different from each other and all were made by me. i chose the sounds , etc. actually, as i've written about a bunch of times... the real reason i was kicked of my record label finally was because i GOT some breasts! they didn't know how to market me when i went from androgenous little girl freak to "just another busty blonde" i don't think it's fair to just hone in on the sexual aspects of a record if it's a woman who made it. and then say "well, she's selling her sexuality!" well, YA..i am "selling my sexuality..and also my sense of humour..and also my sadness, and also just my whole perspective on things within the framework of ten songs and a few photos. how can u take the sexuality out of a woman who is sexual any more than u can take out any part of her? it's all one..it's all wholistic! i won't stop being sexual in hopes that i'll be taken more seriously or to "make people pay attention to the music more" it's all one. ya,
i'm sure some women in that industry..all industry..are pimped and prodded,
and that's where you are getting this idea that perhaps allanis or i
are perhaps being pimped somehow. and the industry is mysogynistic. and once they saw how popular my topless shows were ( but they didn't realize that my NOT topless shows were ALSO popular ) they DID push for me to be topless at a few of my shows when the big wigs were in town to see me to check me out. and that pissed me off.. and that was sick. and i did give in to them two times about it just to get them off my back because things were stressful enough. and
then after that i snapped back and said..hell no..i'm only going to
be topless when i FEEL like it! and sure there have been times when i just wanted to say "fuck you i'm going to wear a potato sack on stage now because you've ruined my sexuality for ME" but i will not let them take that away..because that's their distortion and their "issue" not mine. i'm just a girl who writes songs who happens to be pretty and enjoys wrapping herself up in saran wrap and high heels cause it looks damn cool and it's fun! and there really isn't anything more behind it than that... except for when that innocent fun gets you thrown into a political battlefield..which i seem to be in a lot. i
did not have a marketing plan to decide to be a beautiful naked woman. why
can led zepplin run around like a peacock with a perpetual hard on..wearing
next to nothing yet still achieve critical aclaim? -------------------- oh,
and yesterday i cleaned like a maniac! i have things in more organized
piles now :) and my cords are not as crazy and firehazard-esque as they
were. i felt really "butch" again as i untangled those suckers
and plugged them into new clean power strips! oh,
and i was reading jennifer's journals
, too. and that was really heavy also! and i want to write her a HUGE
email of support, but once again...because i have TOO much to say, i
do not get it said! sooo muchhhh to conveyyy in grrreat earrrnest!!! |