| march
15th, 2007 |
||
5:06pm
i have an octopus inside of me
last night M FINALLY felt the baby kick! 3 times he felt it :)
it was very very exciting for both of us :)
he got a wild grin on his face and his eyes were wide.
he bent down and starting talking to our little matoog, kissing my belly to
the point of tickling :)
he is going to be a wonderful father :)
i'm so glad he felt it after all these weeks that i have been feeling it move.
i wish there was a gender nonspecific word other than it.
15 more days til the ultrasound and maybe we will be able to say he or she.
it's weird how things like that are at all important...it's just frustrating
to not be able to have a gender nonspecific word.
i try to come up with one but i am at a loss.
i don't want to say "it" but i don't know what else to say.
anyway, he felt it and it was good :)
i ordered more food online. i'll
get it tomorrow.
i got my floradix iron supplement stuff today.
it looks like some old fashioned stuff from little house on the prairie.
i also got my aromatherapy bath salt by aura cacia. yum!
3 1/2 days left of taking antibiotics.
i'm confused because i am supposed to take 3 a day for 7 days, but the bottle
contains 42 tablets.
that is going to leave a lot left over.
???
i'm sick of having to take all these
vitamins and antibiotics.
i have to take the antibiotics with food.
i have to take the iron with calcium and no dairy one hour before or after
i take it.
so i have all these rules and hours to take things.
my mom bought me a crib today even tho i told her about least 20 times not
to buy me one.
what is she thinking???
she wrote, i bought a crib today, do you know anyone who might need one?
i wrote back, why did you buy a crib, i'm confused?
she can return it.
i do not like people picking out large pieces of furniture for me that i will
have to look at for a long time.
she has really good taste, but seriously, i told her NOT to buy me one over
and over and over and over.
and she goes out and buys one. it's maddening.
and it's on wheels which, to me, sounds like a godawful idea, the dogs and
everything bumping into it, it rolling all over the place. plus she said it's
extra small so it's only for when the baby is really really small, and i am
not going to be having my child sleeping in a crib when it is really really
small. i am going to have it sleep with me/us. i told her this ad nauseum.
even if i did use it, i'd have to go buy a larger one later.
why do i need to deal with that?
i told her if i do decide i need a crib, i will go get one and pick it out!
or if she is so gung ho on getting me one, why can't *I* choose which one
i want (and matt! i don't mean to say he doesn't have a say! he has to look
at it, too!) , if and when i/we want it?
why doesn't she listen to me?
*throws hands in the air*
it's exasperating.
i know what i want to do for my birthday
now.
i am going to go up and take my photo with my belly in front of my grandpa's
barn.
i saw it the other day and it's starting to lean. soon it will fall over and
collapse. so sad.
i have so many good memories of being in that barn, the moo of cows slurping
their salt licks and the sweet smell of the hayloft.
the way the sun would trickle through the cracks in the wood.
the sound of the wind whistling through. so fresh.
it's squeaky rooster weathervane twirling way up high.
swirling silos i was told not to touch. the sound of electric fences humming
ominously.
i'd sit in the hayloft and look out at the prairie.
the barn was such a mysterious and large place for me as a child.
it was almost like a church.
now the red paint is almost gone, and by the time my child has grown, it will
be nothing but a pile of scrapwood.
how easily a family legacy can fade away and radiate.
so before i turn 41, i am going to have my photo taken in front of it...
the death of the old and the birth of the new.
a perfect bookend for my "40 in portal"
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