| december
10th, 2006 |
||
7:15pm
got up early as it's hard to sleep.
then fell back to sleep at 2pm until 5pm.
i'm glad i'm getting some sleep in there.
i lined up 7 valiums as my last ones i can take and put the bottle away.
read more about symptoms of pregnancy that i hadn't found before and now those
hot flashes i was having and not understanding make sense. i was so confused
as to why i was getting hot flashes but now i know it is a symptom of pregnancy.
i also i have allergies to something, they said nasal congestion was another
symtom.
and itchy skin.
and wanting to drink a ton of water more tham usual.
and i never have a desire to drink water and now i just have to drink a glass
about every hour it seems.
so i'm glad these are symptoms because i was a bit like, wtf?
tomorrow fuzzy is taking me to the doctor, i think.
i want to go to planned parenthood, i've decided, because they have an ultrasound
machine.
but they don't take appointments at the one i want to go to, you just have
to get up really early on that day call them, and see if you can get in that
day.
if i don't have an ultrasound i will go crazy because i desperately want to
know how far along i am.
i think i can just prove how much $ i make a year by bringing in my bank statements
from the past year.
and i hope they have a sliding scale fee. i think they do.
and i hope i can get in tomorrow.
and i hope fuzzy can take me or i'll take a cab because i just can't bear
the suspense anymore.
ok, amazing race is on. gonna see
who wins!
i hope it's not that cranky couple.
i'm hoping for the black women.
1:11pm
so, just out of interest, how do
you feel about me raising a baby on cam?
where do you think lines should be drawn? what do you think is ok about it
and what do you think would be not ok?
be honest. (although i will end up doing what i feel is right, i am still
curious about public opinion on this).
this is what my baby may look like right now.
or at least by the end of this month.
i'm just guessing.
i see a doctor tomorrow!
so far, i feel no nausea. hurray!
maybe i will not get that symptom.
that would be a great thing.
*crosses fingers*
when does the soul enter the body?
i
think it is sort of like this perhaps.
i don't "feel" a soul/being in me, i feel more like whoever is coming
is still "out there" watching me with curiousity.
maybe it enters and leaves my body for a few minutes here and there, "testing
out the waters", so to speak.
i lay in bed and try to connect with it.
but i still feel it mostly in "the ether", not in my body.
it's all very strange and curious.
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