| december
7th, 2006 |
||
11:19pm
i'm reading the book "tantric
awakening" and i am so happy with it.
many of the things in there i am already working on.
i am shy to orgasm in front of M.
i know that sounds weird for me.
but dammit, i was going to do it, come hell or high water.
(i've done it twice before, i think)
what would usually take me 5 to 10 minutes took me like 1/2 an hour or more.
then afterwards he entered me and had a wonderful orgasm, too :)
joy :)
i had a breakthrough the other day
when he went down on me for a very long time.
i love that, but i always feel so guilty if i take too long.
but suddenly, after trying SO hard to have an orgasm i just stopped trying
and relaxed into just loving the feel of it just for the sake of that.
and it was then i realized that he was the 1st man to go down on me because
he truly LOVED me and wanted to make me feel good and happy and i didn't have
to imagine i was in some sort of porn film where the guy just seems to be
doing itfor himself or something.
and i started to cry tears of happiness that i was finally open enough to
see this and let this in and find this extraordinary man who would do this
for me, not just to turn himself on, but to please me.
and i didn't come, although i was close so many times.
but then i started to cry and so that was the end of it for me, but a sweet
ending and perfect.
and then he came inside of me and had an explosive orgasm and i have never
felt so close to another human being before.
i love him with all my heart.
he comes home and kisses me and kisses
me and fills me with light and love.
i am so in love with him, it's ridiculous.
4:49pm
TONS more images added to the image link below!
10:33am
(more images coming soon)
hmong-voog
i have noticed today that the hmong use the word "voog"
i am wondering what it means in hmong?
i can't find a sufficient online translator.
i have noticed the word "voj" often precedes voog.
it seems that voj means circle. and "voj, lub, voj" means loop.
"kab phua plawv voj voog" means diameter
so it seems voog is something to do with math?
right now it's 4 degrees out! but very sunny. the sun is shining on my skin
and it's nice and warm.
my breasts are hella sore.
i've decoded to give up worrying about baby names and trying to find out how
pregnant i am.
it was driving me bonkers.
m and i came up with the bombastic name of lilith kali shekinah voog last
night :)
ha :) that's out name of the day. if you add it up numerologically it equals
111.
so i thought that was pretty cool.
in short, she can just call herself lili voog.
i'd like to name her lili idea voog. but m doesn't like "idea",
although i cannot understand why because it's a great word.
we've got all sorts of bombastic names if it's a boy, too.
like maximillion gabriel voog
or max walken voog
or gabriel walken voog
we want gabriel as a 1st name, but we don't want anyone calling him gabe for
short because we hate that.
i also like the name lake, axis, and core, but M isn't so crazy about those
ones.
i'm doing well getting off my medications.
in 2 more weeks i should be off of the ones that are potentially harmful.
i'm taking my new prenatal vitamins.
is drinkiing ONE non diet coke rrreeaaally
bad?
i mean, i know i shouldn't have caffeine. but does it really have THAT much
caffeine in it?
dang.
everything else i have been drinking is water or orange juice.
i barely scraped by on my rent *praise
be*
thank you to those who donated a few bucks in my stressful predicament.
fuzzybumblebee is going to take me
monday to get an official pregnancy test so i can fill out forms for some
sort of assistance.
i asked [Unknown LJ tag] is she would be my doula and she said she would be
honooured.
fuzzy will film it.
i will also try my best to make a
live webcast of it.
why not?
it's what i do and it'd be fascinating as heck, i think!
for those of you who remember "pussy tv" this can be "pussy
tv , part 2"
we can all see a whole new side to it. yessirree.
the due date could even be on the 10th anniversary of anacam. how is odd is
THAT?
people get in an uproar over my photo of a bloody tampon or a toy car "crashed"
into my pussy.
ya, well, just watch a baby come out.
you ain't seen nothing yet.
of course, i am getting ahead of
myself , as usual, and who knows if i will even deliver this baby full term.
*prays*
i just woke up and those are my thoughts for now :)
oh, here i found some hmong poems both in hmomg and then translated to english.
here is an excerpt of one poem, the 1st in hmong, then the english translation:
http://www.hmoobvwj.com/hmong/poem.htm
NKAUJ HMOOB THAIB TEB
Thaib Teb yog chaw muaj moo, zoo
li mab nroog
Tsev nyob txhij voog, loog tsev los zoo nkauj
Hmoob yaj, lis, lauj, nkauj hmoob siab dawb
Nyiam tham dag tawb, tawb tham ua chaw tshua
I LOVE YOU
I can't express enough here on the
air how much I love you,
because here on the air love shows a language on it's own
with no word, action, or sound…
but it starts deep in the heart where all true happiness is found.
===
here( http://www.hmongdictionary.com/index.php) is found voog means this:
a sound of some strong wind blowing; a sound of many (people running or rushing, for example)
so perhaps in the poem voog means "air"?
and voj means circle or zero.
txhij (the word which preceded voog
in the poem as a verb means to recruit, call up, enlist
as an adj it means ready)
called up the hmong center here and
the guy tried to help and was kind of helpful.
voog seems to mean circle, too, but in a home way. as in your home, garden
to be made beautiful.
your home being a beautiful circle.
so....i'm getting closer to it's actual meaning.
i'll keep trying....
+++
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