| december
1st , 2005 |
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king/klown-oprah/harpo,
and the name david and portals and meetings.
so oprah was just on david letterman,
which is funny because at the same time i was wondering about the name "david"
and i was researching king david and "the davidic line" (which i
didn't know about until tonight, nor did i know how important a role king
david played.
but this all connects in to my fascination with the name of david when i was
signed to columbia records and my A&R man was david kahne who is a very
wise man and showed me many things. and the name david seemed to take on a
"ring" and a "look" to it that made it somehow special.
it seemed almost like mirror or portal to me. DAVID. and that makes more sense
now as the name both begins and ends with a D which is a door. so, in a weird
way, the name david is like a portal or a tunnel or a wormhole, even!
and i sort of 1/2 watched david and
oprah together and it really was quite cool. there was a "meeting"
of opposites somehow there which was very extraordinary. right on the stage
where the beatles were debuted on the ed suillivan show...and diana ross.
that stage is very special. what a "meeting" place it is and has
been! in a way, that stage is a portal, and so, it's perfect that the person
on that stage now is named david. think of how many things have "passed
through" that stage!
even i had the fortune to be on it after a show had finished and i was back
in the green room because i was recording my record for columbia (with david
kahne) and because my manager was bobby z from prince and the revolution (having
lots of thoughts on the letter Z lately, too) who knew paul schafer, we got
to be in the green room when it was chris isaak and fabio on the show. (there
are so many stories just in that one day alone i could go on and on for a
hundred pages)....but i stood on that stage after everyone had gone home and
it really is a lot smaller than it looks on tv...and david letterman's chair
is completely burned by cigars :) i sat in his chair for a brief second and
tried to take it in...but i couldn't.
after david laterman tonight it was the late late show with craig the scottish guy. and craig was going on and on about the david/oprah meeting and he mentioned that oprah is a happy name and that her business is called harpo, which is also a happy word, and is her name spelled backwards.
which made me then realize...oh!
oprah likes the whole "mirrored" thing, too! and she is working
on that level as well!
(which is why i picked ana..same forwards as backwards..and seemed very "egg"
like , but still open, which was a feeling i was wanting to convey..infinity
and being enclosed both at the same time)
then it occurred to me that either consciously (but more likely subconsciously) the whole king/klown thing was being played out in that, too! as i was writing in a previous post (on nov 14th) that the the king and the klown are 2 sides of the same coin and they are literally, mirrors of each other.....
OPRAH is the KING and HARPO is the KLOWN!
now how cool is THAT?
damn! i LOVE stuff like this!!!! it makes me SO happy!!!!
when i see the name oprah just now,
and looking at it from the knowledge i ahve learned about alphabets recently...
the O is a HUGE door...i don't know what P stands for yet, but RA are very
special to me as my legal name is rachael...and i often think of it as RA-chael
(i think of it as a chalice filled with light), the egyptian sungod ra, so
i see RA as LIGHT. i think R is a head and A is an ox (i don't know why, but
OX is an interesting word now, isn't it?)..but is the alpha..the beginning...the
aleph which has no sound...but the head whch is R...speaks the unspeakable
A...and through this...the H....the ladder to heaven, the number 8 which is
the sign of infinity, and also like 2 strands of dna combining. to opposites
I - I ...H coming together in union so that a ladder will be formed from the
union...but also a gate to keep us IN and a gate to go THROUGH. (i like thru
better :)
so oprah's name is darn cool! and i can see why it fits her so well.
her name is like earth going to heaven,
and her business is heaven coming to earth :)
and she is so popular because she does know how t be her inner king AND her
inner klown as one.
and i think david, well in tune with his inner klown is finally coming to light with his inner KING. and i think the meeting between oprah and david assisted in that a bit. and perhaps david assisted oprah in seeing her inner klown more? i think oprah is definitely at ease being a klown, but she still needs to keep in touch with that always...just as david really needs to step up and claim his king side in a serious way and not a klown way.
(yes, my brain is on full volumne lately and i can't seem to watch or listen to anything without seeing its many multifaceted dimensions! FUN!)
or duh, and dog is the klown of god! absolutely :)
call me crazy and reading into stuff but this makes me happy :)
zoom!
anyway, it's really strange how everything
from that period of my life is coming back to me now in a different way.
it's like that time of my life was this special NUT that keeps hatching and
hatching new things.
even tho things didn't work out for me in the music "BIZ" (thank
god!) that time on columbia was absolutely the most magical time in my life.
i was totally "plugged in" and meeting others who were also "there".
and it was a moment in time that stands still and a HUGE portal is opened
and TONS of light shine through and i have still been digesting what all that
was here, 10 years later.
it's like the SEED that was planted that time is finally NOW bearing fruit.
and i am finally picking this fruit and understanding what on earth happened
to me then and why.
it's funny because that was right
when i started getting introduced to jewish culture because bobby is jewish
and david is jewish, and there were a ton of jews all over the place. and
then my next 3 boyfriends were jewish (but not practicing jews, and i didn't
go out with any of them because they were jewish, i found out after the fact
that they were jewish...)
so i started to refer to myself as "a partidge in a jewish tree"
at that time and have felt that way ever since.
it is such a gift, truly. i AM a partridge in a jewish pear tree :)
and that is why i wear the bracelet
columbia gave to me for my birthda still on my wrist, to remnd myself that
not all of my experience was "evil", although ironically, columbia's
address is 666 5th avenue. (5 golden rings? lol :)
and if you look into "columbia", 666 makes a LOT of sense. i can
see now why they are located there.
i feel entirely happy here. it's
funny because i have had the 12 days of xmas song in my head nonstop for a
week now because i was working on my phtos for the 12 babes of xmas. and it
was driving me NUTS.
7 swans a swimmin 6 geese a layin, FIVE golden Riiiiiiiings! 4 calling birds
3 french hens, 2 turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree! (i looked the
song up and the meaning behind the song is very interesting!)
which COMPLETELY fits with my dream of the tree of life which lead me here. as i dreamed of a pear tree and i wanted the pear in tiphareth....and then the pear tree turned into a fig tree. a really special one with very special extra amazing figs that i can still taste in my mouth and are not from this earth. ti was like a HYPERfig...hidden underneath the bark of the tree.
and the other day the most amazing
thing happened to me...jason's dad said to me "i can't wait until you
are my daughter in law". just out of the blue like that! well i almost
started to cry! because no one has said that to me before. i don't "fit"
in anywhere. no one has EVER asked me to be a PART of something like that,
in that way.
and it does not matter if ever i become a legal daughter in law to me, it
was right THEN i became on in the spirit.
as a father was saying to me...i invite you into my family...it was like...a
true gift to me....
and days later on thanksgiving the
dad walked by me after dinner and said "want a fig?" and handed
me one.
and it was so symbolic to me, this simple gesture. it made me so happy.
i really do feel like something is
changing in me, i am feeling transformed into another level of me. a ME-t-ing.
:)
sorry to sound like a freak, but i just have to write this out and say it
outloud! it's a process. i am grateful for this.
thank you universe!!!
10:16pm
questions:
1. is english the only alphabet that has upper case and lower case letters?
2. why is a circle the preferred shape for a dish?
3. why do chopsticks continue to be popular? (seriously!)
4. is there a formal religion which teaches the kabbalah, but also is interested in what jesus had to say as a historical figure and important mythical archetype without the belief that he is "the saviour"? and is there a place that one could go study it and get a formal degree in it?
i was looking here to see what the requirements are to be a rabbi and this is the 1st place i came across on the net and i was sad to see this:
"Good Standing
The ideals and practices of Conservative Judaism are an integral part of the
lifestyle and program of The Rabbinical School. All students in The Rabbinical
School are expected to be committed to and live an observant Jewish life.
Standards of personal and professional conduct and interpersonal relations
are a significant part of the tradition to which the school is committed.
Accordingly, the dean of The Rabbinical School reserves the right to deny
admission, registration, readmission or ordination to any student who in the
judgment of The Rabbinical School faculty committee is determined to be unsuitable
to the profession of the rabbinate. "
http://www.jtsa.edu/rabbinical/prs.shtml
they are really missing out on a lot of cool people who could be rabbis by being so arrogant as to think they should be the ones who should decide who can be a rabbi or not.
and maybe the ones who have lead
a less than perfect life are exactly the ones that NEED to go to rabbi school.
why DENY someone their right to study knowledge?
doesn't EVERYONE benefit if everyone
has the right to study knowledge? who can we know who is "good"
at what or what latent gifts one might have if one isn't given access to knowledge?
7:41pm
ah, i am so happy right now :)
i love these little pockets of happiness that i come into every now and then
:)
everything feels safe.
i have all my candles and incence lit.
comforting familiar television which is not taxing on my brain.
all the muffins are on the bed and squishable.
my stomache is full of rice crackers and cheese.
there is nothing more i need to do today...
i feel good :) satisfied. content.
i wish i could hold on to this feeling forever...but i know it's like the
weather...
but right now, a patch of sunlight in my "yard" of life :)
i relish it.
7:02pm
ok, i made it to the store and got
caffeine. i know, bad!
but seriously, i am cannot even think!
i am zoned out thinking about which letters of the alphabet are symmetrical
and which are not.
WHY?
symmetrical all ways:
HIO
symmetrical could fold in 1/2 vertically
AHIMOTUVWXY
symmetrical could fold in half horizontally:
BCDEHIKOX
not symetrical:
FGJLPQR
symmetrical in a mirrored way already:
NSZ
i've also had the 12 days of xmas song in my head for a week now and it's
driving me NUTS!
7 swans a'swimming 6 geese 'a laying FiiiiiiiVE GOLDEN Riiiiiiings!
4 calling birds
3 french hens
2 turtle doves
and a partridge in a pear treeeeeeeee!!!!!
fuck.
i'm gonna watch survivor now.
i'm not all that invested in this season. it was not as good as other seasons.
then jason's coming over (he;s excercising now as i should be) and we are
going to watch battlestar galactica (the new remake which is extraordinarily
good!)
---
some lost stuff
http://www.thehansofoundation.org/khr.html
pass: Copenhagen
then do google search: lost zanzibar hansa
what do you make of it?
also go here:
http://www.thehansofoundation.org/alvarhanso.html
and click on the picture!
hmmm!
ah, it's all wikied now:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Hanso_Foundation
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dharma_Initiative
5:50pm
162 more images:
http://www.ana2.com/private/today/30
4:48pm
ok, there is no triple headed god of midgaard.
but i did find out there is a triple
headed dog who guards the gate of Hades!
hmmmm!
god, i want to take a nap.
a link to read later:
http://zero-point.tripod.com/pantheon/Hades.html
(oh weird, as i go to the home page of that it's all about kabbalah! i just can't seem to get away from it, can i?)
it's so weird that the kabbalah is
"the in thing" right now (so the media loves to declare). when madonna
got into the kabbalah and then other "stars" i didn't think anything
of it. i just thought "hmmm"
but them being into it didn't make me go examine it at all.
just as madonna's catholic roots didn't make me go look into the catholic
religion.
so it is strange that the kabbalah has "struck" so many of us at
the same time.
i wonder what was the impetus for madonna to learn kabbalah?
mine was because of my dream. i would love to know what madonna's was.
there is definitely SOME sort of mass consciousness shifting going on and
the kabbalah is tied into it somehow.
it's very very interesting and strange how these things work.
4:19pm
i amuse myself :)
3:43pm
yep, i'm going to take it easy now.
i think i will read. i worked on photos for 3 days.
i can't wait for you to see the results!
it's so frustrating i want to show you NOW!
it so so grey out and so so coldish.
it makes it hard to stay awake.
i may have to go to the little store for more red bulls if i am going to stay
awake at all.
i'm just so happy with how my pictures turned out.
and the 2nd one which is the compilation of 24. i out 2 side by side all the
way down and then numbered the pairs 1 -12. and for each pair, the number
was perfect for that set even tho i had not planned it.
i love when stuff like that happens :)
i wish i could afford to get 3 of these things about mary magdelene on william henry's site:
http://site.williamhenry.net/index.php?option=com_wrapper&Itemid=35}');
"HOLIDAY SPECIAL!
BOOK AND DVD SPECIAL HOLIDAY OFFER!
Take advantage of my special offer. Get “The Illuminator” book
and my two new lecture DVDs, “The Stairway to Heaven: The Lost Secrets
of Mary Magdalene” and “Anointing of the Dove” for just
$54.95, plus $5 p & h. That’s a savings of $20."
i need 60 bucks! neeeeeeeeeeeed.
*drool*
or at least get that book "the illuminator"
that is pretty much what my photos are about in a lot of ways, so it was weird
to get an email from that site today telling me i should buy that book! so
much serendipity today.
but no, i must pay my rent! *kicks snow*
maybe i should have william henry,
whitley streiber, and bill nelson in my movie, too. they should be part of
a 3 headed god.
the thing is there are NOT that many photos of the 3 of them around, so it
would be hard to do.
and no one would get it except for me.
i would have to say outloud in my movie "ohmigosh, it's whitley
streiber, william
henry and bill
nelson...the tripleheaded god of midgaard! what are you doing in portal
north dakota?"
man, i might just have to do that for the sake of complete absurdity.
ok freak me right out! i did a google image search on midgaard and came up with this:
now i don't know if you recall (or
even read) the dream i had of the man in a garden with a circular fence around
it and the snakes/dragons that were encircling it...but DAMN!
that is IT right there!
freak me right out!
3:35pm
paid the electric now, too. now i'm
paid up there.
now i just have to hope i have enough in my account to pay my rent by the
5th!
*crosses fingers*
3:30pm
holy crap, i'm so glad i remembered
to pay my phone bill!
it was due today or else it would be disconnected. *WHEW!*
that was a narrow one!
and now i must pay my electric!
2:55pm
i took all 24 pictures and made them
into one picture for rob to simplify it.
then i will out the mouseovers and full size jpegs of all the photos for everyone
to photoshop and manipulate and have fun with and see what people come up
with.
now i just need to write something up that explains this all to everyone because
i know not everyone is going to get the symbology of it, and usually i don't
like to explain it, but in this instance i think i would like to explain it
so people aren't just completely bewildered out of their minds, which i know
they will be.
like HUH? what does this have to do with xmas? :)
it was really hilarious because the picture i sent rob is 400 by 2012 pixels
big.
and the 2012 (2012 is the end of the mayan calendar) part was sheerly coincidence
and completely fits in with the entire series. so ha!
ah, i'm glad to be mostly done with
this now.
i just have to make the pages of it all on my site and upload it all and get
it all ready.
but i'm going to take a break from that right now and eat something.
1:56pm
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a sneak peak of what i am working
on :)
shhhhhhh!
i think it's ok to let you peak 'cause these are small, unfinished and monotone.
just wait til you see them big, finished and in colour :)
they will also be mouseovers.
i have 1 finished, and 24 unfinished that go under the 1.
i am thinking of leaving the other 24 unfinished to let everyone else photoshop
them for anapix and see what they come up with.
(that and i am lazy to do 24 pictures! i mean i have already worked so hard
on them...to do what i want to do to them...24 of them...it owuld just take
forever!)
so i may have an anapix contest with the unfinished 24.
i think that would be cool to see what people do with them :)
11:39am
touched by his noodly appendage
thanks btripp for this picture!
hahaha! :) in searching for high resolution photos of christopher walken,
i came upon this:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Touched_by_His_Noodly_Appendage.jpg
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flying_Spaghetti_Monster
happy december 1st!
november just flew by!
i'm going to work on the photos i took last night that go with the one for
the 12 babes of xmas. but then i thought this morning, looking over them,
that the rest are not very xmassy at all!
just the 1st one i did relates to xmas. the rest relate to something else,
but they are definitely relatd.
well, you'll see what i mean.
i am not the 12th babe of xmas, so
i was not posted today.
i wonder which number i am?
i would just like to know so i knew how many days i have to work on these
pictures!
see the 12th babe of xmas, cryx, here:
http://robont.livejournal.com/
some really nice photos!
my dreams were really blech.
lots of old boyfriends in them, trying to get rid of them.
exhausting.
it's very grey and cold out today. 19 degrees.
after i finish these pictures then i MUST put all my energy into doing my taxes, that will be the A#1 thing i WILL finish by the end of december.
as for getting rid of things, i think i have made a lot of progress in that area and even tho i did not get rid of 1/2, i got rid of a LOT and i am satisfied with my progress in that area enough that i can feel satisfied on new years eve about it.
i also do not know if i will get down to 100 pounds. i waver between 104 and 107. eh...whatever.
so now the 2 things i want to get done for december are:
#1. taxes
and
#2. i want to finish all the crochet projects that i started this year and
never finished so i have SOMETHING to show for 2005 on what i did. because
i DID crochet a bit i just never finished anything.
so those are the 2 things i will now put all my energy into.
i found a guy on lj who is going to help me make my cardboard christopher walken for my movie.
and i have a lot of keys coming my
way from people!
a few said they have one or two..but there is one guy who works at a door
place who has 60 pounds of keys from his work!
so those are on their way to me! ha :)
but those will probably all lok alike and be new.
so i still need old and different keys. so keep sending me keys!
the keys are for a big scene where
the ground is covered in keys :)
intriguing
images
(all the other images of this type in the
11.20.2005
anagram)
more pictures:
http://www.ana2.com/private/today/29/
http://www.ana2.com/private/today/28/
http://www.ana2.com/private/today/27/
http://www.ana2.com/private/today/26/
http://www.ana2.com/private/today/25/
http://www.ana2.com/private/today/24/
+++
Horoscope for Aries (December 1 2005)
Today is the day to get out and have fun. Make plans and don't spare any expense. Meeting people will lead to interesting conversations and inspiring new ideas. Make a personal change that will improve your daily attitude.
and
Maternal instincts
Weak, transient effect: This influence is good for all kinds of relationships
in that all your contacts with others this morning are warm and emotional.
You do not choose superficial or formal contacts but instead desire to make
a personal connection with everyone you meet. At the same time you feel a
strong need to protect and nurture those whom you are close to. There is something
of the maternal instinct in the way you care for others. You are also very
sensitive to people's emotional needs and wants, which enables you to respond
to them at a very deep level of understanding. You will want to feel that
you belong to any group that you associate with at this time. Fortunately
you will also be able to make others feel that they belong with you. Your
emotions are so much closer to the surface of your being that you can see
them clearly.
and
The lightning bolts strike and the party begins! You have been waiting for this moment, but no matter how you imagined it unfolding, things are not the same as you envisioned. Don't worry about the differences. What is significant is that you are moving forward again, even if it feels like you are still treading water.
and
Thursday we make it to the New Moon! The Sabian Symbol for 10 degrees Sagittarius is, "In a pageant of progress a glorious little maid with golden hair enacts the part of the goddess of opportunity" So often the fresh ideas and opportunities are a bit fragile. You have to stand behind them in the present moment, not dragging the critic of the past or the naysayer of the future into it. Just planting you feet in a sense that gives traction and points towards the direction you want to head. Sure footing can be fleet like a dancer if you free it up and let it stand alone in the present. The New Moon happens very close to the degree Saturn is sitting so choices made or unmade now will have influence throughout the next couple of cycles. Dig down and make the choices from the deepest part of ourselves. That way the conflicts we face will only serve to strengthen you lock on your vision. Break the re- off of resolve and you get SOLVE!