november 15th, 2005
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9:25pm

thank god my boredom only lasted about 15 minutes. i was able to nip it in the bud.
i know 3 people whose birthday it was today. and 3 more people whose birthday it was today who i do not really know. that is unusual.
i just remembered that sebastian is a scorpio so his birthday must be around now.
he's a little wooket man.

tomorrow for sure for sure for SURE i must get my ass moving and get stuff DONE.
i at least folded the last of my silk chiffon scarves (i have so many and they are all so beautiful! i got them when i worked at the used clothing store those many years), took out the garbage, wrote a poem, invented a google game,
did a load of laundry and a load of dishes, watched "my name is earl", "the office", and an episode of "dr. who" with jason.

it's still rainy out.

i don't think i thought any "big thoughts" today.
which was, i guess, kind of a nice break.

it was just a normal day.

5:16pm

ohmigod, it's official!
i'm BORED!
this hardly ever happens to me, thankfully. but when it does it hate it SO MUCH.
i feel so bad for people who are constantly bored. life must be hell for them.

when i am bored that is a BIG sign i am not on the right path.
i must rip myself away from this computer and get a LIFE.

i see so much of that on LJ "i'm bored. i'm bored. i'm bored someone entertain me". and i think, MAN, how can you be BORED?
there is just too much stuff on this planet to be bored.

but here i am. mars as close as it will be in 13 years on a full moon in taurus...drinking one of the last vanilla cokes....
and i'm bored.
bored bored bored.

i'm forcing myself off this computer now and i am goin to go find something that will rectify my situation.

4:52pm

i cannot get a damn thing done today except write silly poems and make up silly games.
i super suck.

i guess mars is the closest it will be for 13 more years and it is right beside the full moon tonight.
but i cannot see it because it's rainy as all get out here.

no amount of sugar, caffeine, or peppy new wave will make me do anything today except to type.
i am aggravated with myself.

i am going to force myself to go into the thing room and fold the rest of the scarves on the floor.

i have so many emails to get back to.
i have to force myself with every ounce of my will to get anything done.

4:44pm

do you remember your 1st telephone #? (and game to play!)

i can!

(and i just looked it up and holy crap the same house i lived in still has that same phone number! flip me right out!)

i wonder why we remember things like this?
i can't remember my 5th telephone #, etc.

+++

game to play:
take your 1st phone # (take out any dashes, etc, leave off the area code)
and put it into the google image search. so if you number was 123-1234
put into google image search:
123 1234

then add up all the numbers in your phone #
for instance 123 1234 = 15=6

so your number would be 6.
post the 6th image you get from google image search.

+++

my phone number added up to 7, and here is the 7th photo in google image search when i put my 1st phone # into it:

i did the same with my phone # now (which also equals 7) and i got this image:

(it's amazing the games i will come up with to procrastinate)

3:33pm

fred!

fred astaire has been made for my movie by evil_architect (funny lj username to make fred, since fred is an angel in my movie...maybe he is a fallen angel?)! that is fred at evil architect's house...about to rummage through his fridge, i suspect!

this is perfect because, in my movie (40 at Portal: http://ana.livejournal.com/1655800.html) , fred is the muse who inspires me to go to Portal, ND to "find what i am looking for".
so it's perfect that fred will be in my room tipping his hat at me and urging me to get going on making the rest of the characters for the movie and stuff!

i'm going to put him on the wall opposite my bed to keep me going!

 

2:40pm

i added to my silly poem:

a girl from earth

i am a girl, a girl from earth
born in a time i have no worth
i do not care for saturn's rings
i find more joy in earthly things

since mars has frozen all her water,
i am now the earth's new daughter
born from air, dirt, sea, and fire
i learn my lessons low not higher

but earth gives birth to wondrous treasure
like jellyfish which sting and pleasure

jupiter and neptune envy
earth's gold heart and all that men be
stranded in our DNA
a library with which we play

and elephants, ferns, snails and me
held tight by mother's gravity,
unfurl and fold beneath the sun
beginning, end, there's only one

venus is known for shining love
but i'm of earth not from above
and so i suffer, toil, and laugh
with tea and snakes and the giraffe

do not pity for i choose this
my heaven's here in this abyss

p.s.
(very silly, not to be considered to be a part of this poem proper..but i felt compelled to write it anyway)

(so if you'te zeta from orion
trying to claim your stake to zion
you can shove it up uranus
for thinking that, you cannot blame us)

and dear moon, upon reflection
added to this art collection
is it true that you are hollow?
does your man lead or does he follow?

poor mercury and pluto, too
i'm sorry i didn't mention you

1:56pm

there has been the VERY loud sound of a chainsaw outside since 9am this morning.
and it's driving me BEZERK.

i'm still procrastinating.

the full moon is in taurus today.

12:11pm

i'm having a difficult time getting motivated today.

i'm over in bayarts journal talking about the beatles and their offspring.

i had a tiny flash of insight that i take the sun for granted.
it's hard to realy take in (i don't know why) that it is a STAR.
a star that burns with fierce intensity...and intensity so great i cannot even comprehend it even tho my very life depends on it.
the very life of everything on this planet depends on it.
it is pure fire..so hot i can feel it on my skin and it can burn me even tho it is 93.2 million miles away.

93.2 MILLION miles away!
i can't even comprehend that at ALL.
that is SO far away.
yet we can SEE and FEEL the sun!
scientists estimate it to be 5 BILLION years old.
(how they estimate that, i have no idea)

and we think we KNOW about the sun, or even tho earth, for that matter? (no pun intended)

"The word "planet" comes from the Greek word for "wanderer." All of the planets travel around the Sun in the same counterclockwise direction. The planets all rotate, or turn on their axes, as they travel around the Sun."

my silly rhyming poem i wrote today:

i am a girl, a girl from earth
born in a time i have no worth
i do not care for saturn's rings
i find more joy in earthly things

since mars has frozen all her water,
i am now the earth's new daughter
born from air, dirt, sea, and fire
i learn my lessons low not higher

but earth gives birth to wondrous treasure
like jellyfish which sting and pleasure

and elephants, ferns, snails and me
held tight by mother's gravity,
unfurl and fold beneath the sun
beginning, end, there's only one

venus is known for shining love
but i'm of earth not from above
and so i suffer, toil, and laugh
with tea and snakes and the giraffe

do not pity for i choose this
my heaven's here in this abyss

---

it reminds me of one of my very 1st poems i wrote as a child (sorry, i grew up with christian hymns and camp songs so the terrible sing songy rhyming thing is just ingrained in me to my core, unfortunately. it took all the way until i heard the lyrics of byran ferry and morrissey to realize things didn't have to rhyme...i was a slow learning poet...i was never really a "word" person):

being a pirate:

being a pirate i think would be fun
but there is lots of work to be done!

a big ship, what a pleasure
and don't forget the pirate treasure!

i would travel on the sea
and what a lot of things i'd see!

maybe i'd see the great blue whale
or maybe some danger like a hole int the sail!

and then when i got to shore
i wouldn't be a pirate anymore.

+++

here is the very 1st poem i ever wrote (and probably the 1st poem everyone wrote):

i like you
and you like me
come to my house
we'll have tea

(which has pretty much been what i've wanted, still, all my life...and is the basic theme of "hello kitty" :)

11:05pm

my reply under the bed to the long thread on satanism:

"i'm just making this into a new post because i don't want to say this 4 times.

to be a christian is to
a. believe jesus died for your sins and
b. accept jesus christ as your lord and saviour and
c. be baptized in the holy spirit

just because you believe that jesus or god or christ existed or exists does not make one a christian.
simply believing in jesus or god does not make you a christian. it is not that simple.

so saying that satanists are really christians is untrue.

yes, i know that christianity borrowed/stole heavily from pagan tradition, some christian sects more than others.
ALL religions borrow/steal from other religions.
i have never yet found "one true religion" that did not borrow from another.
although i know there had to be a "first religion", as far as humankind is concerned.
but who really knows what it EXACTLY was since, in the very beginning of mankind, mankind did not even know how to write or draw.

in my opinion, which is based on much fact, there is no one true pure religion that hasn't borrowed from another or isn't a hodge podge of several.
and in my opinion, this does invalidate any of the religions because they have done this.

although i do think it is highly rewarding and interesting and helpful to know
the history of one's religion and trace it back as much as possible...because it's all just very fascinating and, in the "end", brings you right back to the "middle of the wheel" ...which is the realization that all religions just make up fragments of one big wheel. a wheel which has 2 sides but is one.

that's the way i see it.

so if you want to say that all satanists are christians because we are all ONE...then yes, all satanists are christians and all christians are satanists. also, all satanists are buddhists and all buddhists are mormons and all mormons are atheists, and so on and so on.

but if you want to get technical. which i am getting technical because my dad is a minister as far as what i know it takes to make yourself be a true christian, in the "technical" sense,
then satanists are NOT christians by any stretch of the imagination.
because simply BELIEVING in jesus does not make a person a christian.

for example, i believe in jesus but i am NOT a christian.

and my dad believes in the devil but he is NOT a satanist, etc."

10:27am

wow, look at me, up in the morning again. i got up at 9:20am around.

i dreamt i went back to stripping (i have a lot of dreams of that) but i was highly acrobatic.
i was flipping around like a pro gymnast.
i was trying to think of what stripper name i should have for myself (that's always fun...but my last one was Tuesday which was a terrible mistake, in the end, since EVERY SINGLE GUY EVERY SINGLE DAY would say "you're names tuesday? well you can in the right day then!" (if it was a tuesday) and if it was not a tuesday, which it mostly was NOT, then it would be "your name is tuesday? but it's wednesday! *insert all other days of the week that are not tuesday*. and they would say this as if they were the very 1st person to say this to me. every single guy. every single day. every single hour. and i would just have to laugh and grin as if they were the funniest person on earth so they would give me a dollar.)

so this time i remembered that and tried to think of something simple that no one would say stupid things about.
and the last name i thougt of before i woke up was "ingrid", but i wasn't totally sold on it yet.

it's very grey and hazy and cold today. 40 degrees. there might be some snow tonight.
it calls for snow tomorrow, as well (light snow) and tomorrow it will be only 28 degrees!
winter is here. all the leaves are off the trees now and everything is taking on the greyish/brown colour of winter.

but then it will be in the lower 40's for the rest of the week.
this month has gone by extremeley quickly.
i am not going to make anywhere near my 50,000 word mark for that writing thing.
although i should just count up all the words i said in here for all of november when all is said and done and see how many words i did write in here. i would be curious to knwo how many words i write a month.

i wish i had a secretary to figure out what i averagely write per month.

all the dogs are on the bed dreaming and twitching.
i've had my oven on to 400 degrees, with the oven door open, for days now. i wish this building would turn on the frickin' heat.

i remember now i had a dream that they were going to turn these apartments into condos so i would be able to buy my apartment and that made me really excited.

i should get to the bank today so i can deposit that cheque for $488 from the guy who bought all the last of my music stuff and magazines with articles and bios and photos. then i'll be able to pay my electric bill and phone bill.

and i have so many things to mail off to people but the boxes are heavy and it's all yucky outside.

+++

Horoscope for Aries (November 14 2005)

Make this a day that counts. Do something that will help you get ahead professionally or increase your earning power. You will have an opportunity to take care of any pressing legal, financial or health matters.

and

Tacit agreements
Valid during several months: During this time you will find it necessary to subordinate your desire for amusement to the needs of the present. In your relationships it may be necessary to confront difficulties that you have not handled earlier. Sometimes problems in relationships arise when tacit agreements are not clear to both partners. This is a good time to discuss those agreements openly. This influence is good for all matters relating to your work or profession. During this time you should enjoy good relationships with both superiors and employees. You understand how good interrelationships make it all work well. You are willing to work with others to resolve any difficulties that may arise. You may gain financial or other favors, quite unexpectedly, from your employer.

The interpretation above is for your transit selected for today:
Venus in the 6th House 6 exact at 02:47
activity period from 14 November 2005 until middle of March 2006.

and

Spending carefully makes sense for you today, Aries, so put your money into basic supplies or tools. Make an investment in yourself like purchasing good food, vitamins or work clothes. No impulsive shopping now, for whatever you buy should enhance your self-worth or your capacity to earn.

and

 

Monday we start the week in Taurus, the moon aspects five planets during the day giving us a full spectrum of the concept of resources at many levels. What does it take to expand and idea or project, how to communicate it, where do we get the energy and where are the limitations. With the moon expanding towards full the basics of life should have some care; water, fresh food, rest. When out commuting and communing with the humans take care and realize that if one explodes in your face it might not have been pointed at you specifically but that you were just in the vicinity. There will be many potential emotional landmines for the next couple of days