| october
29th, 2005 |
||
11:01pm
lordy. just got home.
i am cremastered out! but tomorrow there is 2 more!
we leave at 1pm.
jeez louise. i don't what to say about them right now except how fucking cow,
and how laborious and expensive!
and he sure has a thing for vaseline!
has anyone else seen these movies?
and if so, what did you think?
they remind me a lot of david lynch, in many respects, except even more out
there and undecipherable and bizarre and tense. i just...don't even know what
to say except that parts of it were relecting things i was thinking about
today and the other day..which is the hexagon and bees, and the a rite of
passage or metamorphasis.
i've been thinking about what i want to do for my 40th birthday in 6 months
and i want to think about it now because i want to do something that is very
unique and takes some planning.
at 1st i thought, i will somehow
get to tokyo even if for just one day and at the time of my birth i will stand
in the middle of the city and take polaroids for everyone (as in you send
me the packs of polaroids and i will mail them back to you). i thought, even
tho it would be frustrating to only be there for 1 day and it would be grueling
to get there and frustrating not to stay, it would be damn cool to say i flew
to tokyo for my birthday and took 777 polaroids around the time of my birth
there in the middle of the city.
and then i thought, hey why not easter island?
then i thought iceland or maybe the pyramids.
then i thought if i really wanted to go out with a bang and make a statement
i could run to the wailing wall completely nude covered my entire body in
phylacteries and i would probably get beaten to death.
but what a statement that would make.
but then i thought of something more
practical which became increasingly impractical as i elaborated on it.
and this is what i want to do and i hope i can make it happen somehow. and
i don't want to go into details about it right now, but i have had a lot of
little fillm ideas rolling around in my head for a very long time now. but
they have never come together in this way, and now i have a LOCATION.
portal, north dakota!
i am going to call my film "40
at portal" (or maybe "40 in portal")
i am going to drive to portal north dakota with a small film crew (i don't
know who yet or how i will find them or pay for this)
but it will be my adventures there doing very surreal and seemingly pointless
things that are beautiful.
it is going to be my rite of passage in portal at 40.
it will all be in black and white except for one scene which will be in red.
there will be last chance cafe, a configuration of keys on main street, hitting
a golf ball into canada, a birthday cake in the middle of the plains, burying
a pirate treasure that maybe you can go find and dog up later if anyone can
figure out the puzzle. and a lifesize cardboard cut out of bono.
that's all i will explain right now.
but i am REALLY excited about it.
and i already have a SEQUEL, because that is how my brain works :)
i know this just sounds weird and i don't know how i am going to pull it off.
but i just HAVE to do it.
all these little "scenes" i have been saving up in my head for the
movie i make someday all fit together now because i have a location and mission
and a reason.
i wish i could just insert my head into your head so you could see what i
mean.
it will be dark, twisted, humourous, beautiful and totally ridiculous and
pointless.
so pointless it will have a point.
i'll say it better later when i have gathered my thoughts about it more and
it's taken more form.
1:53pm
bruised right knee
contrast turned up 50% and saturation 100%.
12:10pm
about
the cremaster cycle
http://www.cremasterfanatic.com/
so today i see cremaster 2 and 3.
i will be gone even longer than i thought because i thought it went from 3
until 7 but i misread it. cremaster 2 starts at 3pm and cremaster 3 STARTS
at 7pm (not ends)!
holy bujesus.
jason went to a different running shoe store so now we don't have to leave
until 2pm instead of 1pm.
but now that i look at the running times of the movies, one is 79 minutes
and the other is 189 minutes.
so there is a heck of a lot of time inbetween movies (the 1st movie is the
79 minute one)
why would they have HOURS in between the movies? that kind of sucks, it think.
i guess that gives jason and i lots of time to go find food and go for a walk
in my old neighbourhood.
and i've already seen cremaster 3 on dvd but it'll be cool to see it on a
bigger screen and in context of seeing these in order.
i had 1 horrible dream all night
long that i was stuck in this awful cult that sexually abused children and
killed people to harvest their organs. i tried to convince them my organs
were no good because i had aids and then i went about to prove to them how
helpful i could be to the cult by crocheting them all hats and i convinced
them i was super super happy to be there and i would never tell on them that
they were killing people. it was extremely stressful and this went on for
hours as i watched tiny unformed children in petri dishes sent out to be sexually
abused and dead bodies were acumulating under the house attracting and creating
many flies.
finally my dad came to visit and i still had to pretend that i was super happy
to be there but i grabbed pooka and left all the rest of my belongings there
to go for a "walk" with my dad (and never come back).
i tried to think of when would be a good time to tell him what was going on
with me and so we could also inform the police but i was afraid they had bugged
and put cameras all over the city to monitor me and no where was safe to talk.
and i knw that if i said anything they would come after me and kill me and
possibly my dad, too.
so it was all very tricky.
so i'm really glad to be awake and out of that reality because that SUCKED.
now i'm going to take a bath and eat something and get ready to go.
mathew barney who made those films
and bjork have a daughter najmed isadora.
i wonder what it would be like to be the daughter of these 2 eccentric people?
i would be highly interested to hear what she ahs to say about her parents
when she grows up!
+++
Horoscope for Aries (October 29 2005)
There are financial changes coming your way, so get ready to deal with the possibilities being handed to you. Your dynamic way of dealing with things will be impressive and inspire the people around you.
and
A fruitful dialogue
Weak, transient effect: Tonight you may experience a real conflict between
feelings and reason, or you may have a very fruitful dialogue about the state
of your soul, either internally or with another person. In the first instance,
old habits, prejudices and childhood patterns of thought are very likely to
take precedence over what you usually consider reasonable; obviously this
is not a good time to enter into delicate negotiations or to engage in an
important discussion. As for the other side of this influence, this is a good
time to withdraw by yourself or with another person and get in touch with
your feelings. As long as you recognize that your emotions are emotions rather
than rational judgments, you will not have trouble with this influence. In
fact, you can learn a great deal about yourself, because your feelings are
very clear.
and
Get your chores out of the way as early in the day as possible, so as not to interfere with the opportunities for pleasure that may later come your way. Even if you run into an unexpected detour, stick with your original plan as much as possible. By the time evening rolls around, you will be able to give up control and meet any enjoyable situation half way.
and
Saturday the Moon moves into Libra
and a sense of peace and relief from the frenetic week. A revisit of the Venus/Pluto
conjoining happens with the moon while we sleep, so the morning has a haze,
an attempt for dreams and intuitions to stay with us into our waking state.
If you got through the physical purge now the time is great to get to the
non-physical, the arena of relations. Always first check out the person in
the mirror before heading out and wildly fixing and sorting for others . We
often worry so much about lovers, family, close friends. What about cleaning
up the energy with acquaintances?