september 22nd, 2005
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10:52pm

tomorrow i go to the U2 concert with jason!
yay!!!!!

10:14pm

i remember seeing pictures of aimee mullin's clear prosthetic legs in cremaster 3 over a year ago and i was so captivated by it. i wish i could get a REALLY good picture of it.
and at the end she had these "attachments" to her legs that looked like clear roots were growing out of her legs.
it blows my mind in a way that i cannot fully articulate.
i think it is some amazingly beautiful... vulnerable flesh continuing and fusing with these delicate, perfect carbon fiber legs.
what could be more futuristically robotic!
and then to go even further with that by making the end into these clear roots, like roots of a tree...
it's so beautiful and opens my mind to so much.
the image of that. seeing it. opened in this doorway in me.
i wish i had a clear photo of the roots "legs".
i want a poster of it.
what i do with my hats...how you could make these organic free form attachments for your body that have no basis in human form. i'm just...wow.

 

9:47pm

cremaster 3 by mathew barney (bjork's boyfriend), some csi, some commercials

of course the cremaster 3 HUGELY about masonic rituals.
i just cannot escape the masons these days!

 

6:34pm

5:46pm

11:33am

i hope you could make it through yesterday's nervous ramblings of a madman :)
my horoscope below "cloudy communications" kind of sums that up!
it's wayyyyy less hot today. yesterday was in the upper 80's, today, so far, it's only 64.
the big storm has moved elsewhere. that was freaky last night! so much lightning!
trying to shake the remnants of last night's dreams from my body and mind.
listening to duran and drinking my diet coke for breakfast.
ya, i was trying not to drink it but i fell of the bandwagon.
diet coke is my one vice that is so hard for me to give up.
i think it has something more to do with a comfort thing, a familiarity thing, a continuity thing..than it actually is about that i actually like the TASTE of it.
i want to give it up, tho, because not only is it bad for me and full of chemicals, but it is an evil corporation.
but, goddamn, coca cola is just kind of a part of the fabric of my being!
like america is hotdogs and apple pie.

when i woke up today i thought it was friday, and so i thought i was going to U2 tonight, and that bummed me because for the 1st time i did not feel like going.
but friday is TOMORROW, so i am greatly relieved.

is today the equinox?

weird email of the day:

"hey... im not sure if you remember me....but i just wanted to tell you i made it home ok....i went to the police station and they got me a bus ticket home....sorry i was an asshole, im not usally like that. If you dont know what i am talking about... get back with me and i'll send another email explaining more.... "

at 1st i thought this person just mistakenly sent me this, meaning it for someone else...but then he sent it to 2 of my email accounts...so...he DID mean to send it to me, as far as i can tell, because it would be awfully weird to make the same mistake 2 times.
so....
WTF?
i don't know who this guy is. it kind of creeps me out!
and it doesn't make any sense. i'm most certainly NOT writing him another email to find out what he is talking about.
even tho, for my peace of mind, i'd like to know what the fuck he is talking about.

+++

Horoscope for Aries (September 22 2005)

Don't take a break -- there is too much at stake and too much to be accomplished. Your hard work and dedication will pay off. Travel if it will help you pull a deal together.

and

Cloudy communication
The difficulty with this influence is that you will find it hard to keep emotional issues from clouding your communication with others. You may be expressing your unconscious drives and impulses more than communicating a logical message, but that is not all bad. If you are subject to such compulsions, it is good to express the energy that lies behind them and bring it out into the open. Old thought patterns, attitudes from the past, and unconsciousness about your present situation all endanger your mental effectiveness today. It would be best not to try to reach any important conclusions now. If you do, you will probably have to change them tomorrow.

and

It's official; summer is over. Endings are nature's way of making room for new beginnings, and new beginnings are what you Aries are all about. Set aside time to think about all that has happened since last spring and the events that have led up to now. Write down your current goals, for your words today have greater impact than you may realize.

 

Important long-term influences:

A painful sting ***
Valid during many months: There could well be a very painful argument if you react in an unconsidered manner during this time. Without warning one word leads to another until you suddenly show yourself to be hard and hostile in order to cover up one of your own weaknesses. In this way you can hurt your partner, a friend, or someone else to whom you are close, so that you greatly reproach yourself afterwards.
This person will probably ask, directly or indirectly, for your sympathy. Unfortunately, in such a way that you are reminded of one of your own hurts ­ a situation in which you had to rely on the sympathy of others. At that time your appeals were rejected or you were belittled, and for that reason you now thoughtlessly refuse to help, even if you are normally a considerate and sympathetic person.

As your own experience probably took place in the distant past, you have forgotten or suppressed it because it was too painful or shameful. For this reason there is a danger that your reaction - presumably unintentionally - will go unnoticed by you or you will only become aware of it when the other person has already been alienated. It could be too late then, and such wounds are often hard to make good.

That is why it is important during this time to be careful during all interactions with people who are close to you. Pay attention when you feel a painful sting. If you remain aware of your feelings and reactions during all personal contacts, you will certainly recognize the situation described above - perhaps even before it occurs. Then you can show the other person the sympathy that you once so urgently needed yourself. In this way, you will not only prevent a distinct rift in your relationship with this person, you will also recognize your own wound.

Transit selected for today (by user):
Chiron Square Sun
activity period from middle of January 2005 until end of November 2005.

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Following through ***
Valid during many months: This is one of the most significant times of your life. During this time your responsibilities will increase considerably, and you will try to eliminate everything in your life that is not necessary to fulfilling them. Therefore your life will become more complex and simpler at the same time. You are finishing up certain tasks in your life and going into a five- to eight- year period of relatively quiet preparation for a new beginning. You will be cutting some elements out of your life and working hard to complete others.
During this time you may have less freedom of movement than usual because of the pressure of circumstances and the need to get things done. Old tasks that have never been completed must be finished now. At work, you may have to exert more effort in order to get the job done. Your superiors may give you even more responsibility than you would choose to have. This may not be a very light-hearted time, but it should be quite productive. But do not start out on a completely new project, because in a few years you may find that you do not have the material or psychological resources to complete it. Finish what is unfinished and simplify your life.

Good relationships will not suffer appreciably during this time, but bad ones will break up completely. You are withdrawing from everything in your life that is unnecessary or in the way of your development during the next few years. Bad or difficult relationships may be among the elements that are discarded.

Try to avoid building a wall between yourself and others, for this is a great danger now. Duty, responsibility and obligations do not preclude personally satisfying relationships, even though you may feel that they do. If you cut yourself off from others unnecessarily, you will become lonely and depressed. The people who belong in your everyday life are very important for you now, especially since you are excluding those who do not belong. Often it is good to seek out the company and advice of older people, for they have the insight and understanding you need.

Transit selected for today (by user):
Saturn Conjunction Ascendant
activity period from 21 September 2005 until end of June 2006.

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Ambitions *
Valid during many months: More than any other, this influence arouses your ambition to achieve. If you can identify with a project, you will work extremely hard at it until it is done. It is especially important now that you find an independent project that requires your individual initiative and effort. You should try to gain independent authority in your work at this time because you are not likely to be very tolerant of other people's authority over yourself. You prefer to be your own boss. But your energy will make an impression upon people who are in a position to help you, as long as you do not challenge them unduly. Conflicts with coworkers may arise if they feel threatened by your efforts to get ahead. You should try to play down such conflicts unless something real is at stake.


Transit selected for today (by user):
Mars in the 10th House 10
activity period from middle of July 2005 until end of February 2006.