july 27th, 2004
past anagrams	menu	utb

11:59pm

i love whitely streiber. what an amazing person and a great teacher and story teller and interviewer and writer and visionary.

10:58pm

atkins is so weird in that you can eat all you want (as long as it's protein) and still lose weight.
i ate so much today. i had 5 eggs, a steak, and 15 mussels and i'm STILL hungry...which is unusual because usually protein really fills me up. well, my stomache feels very full, but i'm still hungry. eating only protein leaves you full but unsatisfied. but being unsatisfied it better than being hungry. but i feel fatter than when i started atkins 2 days ago. i hope the weight loss part kicks in soon. yes, i'm impatient. maybe i just have pms again? is it that time of the month? it might be. my face is breaking out, too.

i wonder if i'll be able to get a walk in tomorrow. or maybe being nervous with my mom will be enough for calorie burning.

i ordered 90 bucks worth of groceries from simon delivers. all protein. cheese, fish, meat, eggs, and no calorie drinks.
and this atkins ice cream, i have to try it. since you can have cream in atkins as long as it's real cream. it's just a sugar free ice cream. i'm excited. i hope it's good. it's probably not god, tho, all those atkins ready made food like the bars and especially the shakes really are pretty gross. but when you are dying for ANYTHING other than cheese and eggs you will eat ANYTHING, just for something different.

many people don't really understand atkins diet, tho. you really should read the book. you only do the 100% protein thing (and i think you can have 20 grams of carbs a day) for 2 weeks to break your sugar addiction. then , you slowly start reintroducing carbs back into your diet. most people don't know that part.

oh shoot, i wish i had more vitamins. that is the thing, too, is that you have to take lots of vitamins during the 1st 2 weeks since you aren't getting a very balanced diet.

i wish i had my own personal chef for the atkins thing. there really are a lot of interesting recipes to try that i never do.
you can make it so much more interesting than i go about it. but i'm too lazy to figure it all out. i should, tho. i would probably be more successful with this diet if i did.

what really makes more sense to do tho is the south beach diet. that is just a plain old common sense one.
i think with that one you can eat all the veggies you want with it, too, only certain kinds , tho.

after i can't stand the atkins anymore, i'll switch the south beach.

and if i can just keep walking 45 minutes a day or more, then i'll be doing pretty well :)

the reason i started gaining weight again is because i was starting to drink too many sugar cokes again. and drinking wine and beer at night more often than i should. and that will always make me gain weight.
that, and sitting on my ass not moving. yep, that'll do it.
it doesn't really take much before it just starts creeping on.

so no sugar or beer or sitting around ALL the time for me.
nope. i will lose 10 pounds and finally be back at my original weight ASAP. i am MOTIVATED.

 

 

9:53pm

i'm nervous about my mom coming over tomorrow. she's coming at noon. i'm going to get up at 10am to clean.
i think maybe she is just staying for a few hours. she wants to go out for lunch, but i'm on the atkins so i don't know what i could eat. so, i am still going to make my turkey in hopes that i can maybe convince her to stay in for lunch.
i don't know, i hope it all goes smoothly. i am pretty scared.

6:24pm

prince's musicology seems to be a winner, as well :)
it's not as good as his old stuff...but it's soooo much better than the stuff he had been putting out the last 10 years.

5:57pm

holy shit, i LOVE the new air cd called "talkie walkie" heck ya.
this is just what i needed.

and tonight the finale of america's next top model!

yes, i am soooo shallow today.

sometimes it good to just have shallow superficial summer days.

i feel good i've stuck to the atkins today. and i walked. yes, MUST lose weight. must.

my goal is to lose those stupid last finale 10 pounds i have been meaning to lose FOREVER.

i don't know when i am going to find the motivation to clean for my mom.
i just might not.

 

4:40pm

went to the p.o. box and to the bank, so got a good walk in.
i'm kind of getting sick of just about every single person on the street remarking about my hair or trying to talk to me about my hair, or pointing at me and talking about me with all of their friends. even tho it is mostly all positive, it gets to be exhausting because i just don't know , at first, if it is a positive thing, or if they are going to start calling me names and taunting me, or if they are going to approach me and try to talk to me forever or whatever. so i always have my guard up and it's draining to be like that all of the time.

1:44pm

i'm unthawing a 12 pound turkey. i won't forget about this one.
i didn't think about it, but this will be a good thing to make tomorrow since my mom will be here.

1:08pm

i feel a lot better. almost 100%.

i forgot that tomorrow is the day my mom is coming over here. at noon. good lord. i'm going to try to just shove tha thought out of my mind until it actually happens.

i rrrreeeaaalllly do not feel like cleaning my house for my mom.

side note: i hear really bad jazz music outside.

12:58pm

it's another gorgeoous day outside. and now begins day 2 of my atkins diet.
i'm so pissed i left something out to dethaw and then totally forgot about it so i had to throw it away.
oh well.
i'm still so worried about isa from isabellacam.com. even tho we have all been expressing our worry for her in her bbs for months now, she doesn't reply.
one thing changed a month ago, she or someone changed her next scheduled appearance from 5-28 to "TBA"
but then a few days ago, for some bizarre reason, it changed back to "5-28" and that makes no sense whatsoever.
i have no idea what is going on with her and i am very worried.