july 12th, 2004

11:01pm

today i felt so anxious and discontent all day.but i just breathed my way through it and kept crocheting. i am making this hat that i started maybe 6 months ago or maybe even longer. i spun some of the yarn for it. then i got a bit lost with it and so dropped it for months. now i am finally finishing it after many attempts trying to figure out what it wanted to be. i think i may finally know what it is now, but all the stitched are so super small and tight that it just takes hours and hours and hours and hours to do and my hand cramps up, but it's going to be pretty darn cool, i think :)

3:46pm

ordered the warm leatherette cd single from amazon so i can listen to it and work out some sort of choreography.
or at least ideas for choreoraphy.

maybe i'll even be one of my own models so that i only have to find 2 more.

3:38pm

dressing my mannequins up in the things i want the models to wear.
changing my mind by the minute as to how i want to go about it and who i am going to get to wear the hats and how i will have them walk on stage.

and i have 3 super colourful hats and then 3 more subdued more classy hats. i think i will have 3 models/ballerinas now, not 4...and i will have them walk out/dance out with each of them carrying a mannequin torso wearing another hats. the models will wear the colourful hats and the mannequins will wear the more subdued hats.
the mannequin torsos are very light and i think i will spray paint them silver except i will leave their faces flesh coloured, like a mask. and the models will have silver paint on the faces that are like masks. and so, the models and the mannequins will be opposite of each other. silver with flesh coloured mask, and flesh coloured with silver mask.
and then the models/dancers can set the mannequins on the runway and dance around them or play with them somehow. i don't know. i keep trying to simplify everything but it just keeps getting more elaborate.

now i don't even know if i want ballerinas because i don't know if ballet shoes are going to match at all with these outfits so....i really don't know what to do about models.

and i'm really not in the mood to choreograph a dance for anyone. but i guess that is what nielle, the choreographer is for. but can anyone learn a dance in just one day? she says she will come over and work with the models to learn the parts before the show even. but...do i really want to get all these people together and do thi...and where? and i don't even know who yet. argh. it's a pain in the ass and it's all giving me a stomache ache. but it would be so cool of it all pulled together somehow...

thinking thinking thinking....

dunno if i will make it to the p.o or the bank today...but at least i am working out this show in my head. and that is a good thing.

 

 

 

 

2:42pm

mackenzie can't do my hair today because her car is on the blink.
that works out fine because i'm not feeling at all social today and that is one less thing to worry about then.

i am trying to get motivated to get to the bank or the p.o. or both...

12:42pm

the pictures of the hat don't do it justice at all.
i'll have to try to take beter picture of it later when i get more batteries.

 

12:10pm

i'm looking for a good dance internet radio station so i can shake some of this booty off.

i feel a little nervous and ungrounded today. maybe i need to get outside some.

i've kind of clicked into getting these hats and outfits done and ready for the show on august 10th.
i'm doing 4, fuzzybumblebee and i are collaborating on 2, and she is doing 2.
and then our line will be shown together because they overbooked the show and bumped some designers off, including her, and i was like "fuck that", so i made her line be a part of mine because i didn't want to do it without her.

and then i almost cancelled because of wariness over that and other disorganization but she talked me back into being in it. and now i'm starting to get more clicked into it, so that's good.

her models and the 2 we collaborate on are going to be tai chi students, and my 4 are going to be ballerinas ( i have 2 find 4 ballerinas now). and their fluid movements will be a cool fluid juxtaposition against the sound track of "warm leatherette" by the normal. :)

and we are going to paint their faces all silver and have a bit of a car crash theme, which is what warm leatherette is about :)

i'm glad fuzzybumblebee and i think in very alike and complimentary ways :)

i'm just stuck , once again, between going really colourful and loud, and really more tasteful and subdued, since i have both of these types of hats. i'll probably opt for loud and colourful as that stands out a heck of a lot better on stage.

i have a lot of work to be done! it's less than a month away! i have the hats ALMOST done. i just have to get the outfits together, i have all the ingrediants together for them. i just need to get them on my maneequins and see if it works on them...i neeed to see it all together. i'm glad i have manequins.

mackenzie comes over tonight to help me with my hair. at 8pm. i'm already nervous about that just because i get nervous when other people are at my house. i always feel like i need to entertain or be entertaining. i need to just chill out. but i am nervous.

and i cannot find my debit card. i don't know what happened to it. gah. i have to order a new one. and i have to get to the bank, anyway.

and there are boxes i need to mail out.

i bought some coper wire last night when fuzzybumblebee and i went to the axman surplus store looking for car crash themed stuff for out show.

i have some yellow "danger to not cross tape" and some really shiny silver duct tape that i am going to wrap around the models/ballerinas.

i was working with the copper wire last night and added it to this hat i have been working on forever. and it really just made the hat totally amazing.
i'm trying to get some good pictures of it and then my camera ran out of batteries.

i don't know what to tackle 1st here, today. i have so much to do that i am kind of paralyzed by it all, a bit.

 

1:49am

writing and pix to come...