anagram 10.13.99
a pathetic assortment of campix
compared 2 the last anagram. but so it goes! i have been feeling so yucky
from being on that no carb no sugar thing for the past 5 days that i had no
energy and felt really floaty and just plain WRONG. i did lose three pounds
though just sitting on my ass, tho, so it works. had a dr. pepper and now
i feel MUCH BETTER! i have been brainstorming a million sleep station ideas
and sorting out all the little wrinkles then trying 2 get people motivated
2 get with the new sleep station changes. god, i hope i didn't make too many
"rules" and now everyone will stop doing it! trial and error! but
i have a vision for it on how REALLY grand it could be with just a few minor
adjustments :)
so i just typed and typed today
and yesterday like a mad woman. as will see. i'm just going to include some
of what i've been writing here.
oh, and jason might get the "anaverse station" up for all of u 2
play with sometime this weekend while i'm gone :)
---------
the november issue of yahoo
internet life has an interview with william gibson, and he was interviewed
by ben greenman the same guy who interviewed me :)
and ben asked:
What about Web cams? Is it true that you're a fan of AnaVoog's Anacam [see
"Room Within a View," October '99, page 112]
Gibson replied: She was one of the first that I ran across. I liked her because
she was kind of like a garage Idoru. She was doing it herself.
-------
which is cool cause i picked up a copy of Idoru the other day, i looked at
the back cover 2 see what it was about and thought " hey, this is kind of
what i could be doing if i had more $ and technology and everyone else also
had the technology to see it!
--------
here's something i wrote at peepingmoe.com
as far as u want to, or when
u run out of gas, whichever comes
first Posted by ANA on Wednesday, 13 October 1999, at 11:45 a.m.
, in response to how far do you go?, posted by cwl- on Monday, 11 October
1999, at 4:30 p.m.
ohmigod, about the domain thing. i'm not buying domains that i think is going
to bring me in any traffic! i buy domains for projects i might want to work
on someday, or i am already in the process of doing, like www.sleepstation.com
or i have www.voog.com cause it's my last name for christ's sake! then i have
the .net versions of stuff of the same domain. ya, i have punkgirl.com , do
u REALLY think that name is gonna bring in more traffic for my CAM? i have
little projects for stuff that i'm gonna do with things. as far as business
and pleasure, for me, these two are now one and the same. i am glad to say
that i make my living doing the thing i love the very most :) i don't DO anything
to get "noticed" i just do what i do and i get noticed sometimes in doing
it. it's a cool thing! ya, ok, so if i do something cool to my site, i will
sometimes come in here and tell u about it..so i guess that counts as doing
something to get noticed. but to me it's the same as calling up my friends
on the telephone and saying..hey! i bought a new couch and rented some movies,
do u want to come over and see it? so business and pleasure are the same.
i am very fortunate :) much of my life business was NOT pleasure or FUN, as
it is with the majority of people. which is , to me, one of the greatest tragedies
ever :( so many people are just miserable in their jobs. i hope that i can
, at least in avery small way, show that u can have FUN with your business,
or that u can do business with your fun! and that u really DON'T need to separate
the two! i am a firm believer in the frooty new age way that if u are doing
what brings u the most joy, THAT will ultimately bring u the most fullfillment.
if you are following your heart and your path and your joy, everything WILL
"click" into place :) i really want to bring that message to the people who
are ready to hear that :) it's a scary way to live at first..to throw all
logic out the window and really just follow your gut instinct. like flying
off a cliff and just praying. but it worked! i still have my moments of doubt
where i'm like "damn, i've been so boring all week , everyone will unsubscribe
and i will starve and be homeless". but i just refuse to "do" anything on
my cam that is not completely exactly what i want to do at that moment. i
do not force anything, even when the pessimist side of me is warning me that
i better go be "interesting" now. but it is interesting as i go through this
process and find that , if i go literally minute by minute asking myself "what
u like to do now the mOST?" "what would be most fun?" THAT is exactly where
i should be and need to be doing and that is what will ultimately bring me
serendipitous abundance :) and jenni does not go on TV to "compete" with other
cams! or any of the camgirls i know who have been on tv. we do not say "hmmm,
i better compete! i better call up a tv show and be on it! " lol :) in my
case, it's been that the tv show contacts me out of the blue and asks me if
i want to be on it! and i say "ya baby ya!" :) i had no idea nor did i expect
that i would get so much coverage, but at the same time i am not surprised
it happened. i was at the right time and the right place for some stuff. u
just can't plan something like that. or if u could..could someone tell me
exactly how to do it? cause i'd really like to know the secret :) i would
get way more personal with my cam if i could, but i go as far as i can without
invading others privacy. like there's a whole bunch of stuff with my mom and
dad i'd like to say, but it wouldn't be fair to them to say it. and there's
a lot i would like to say about my boyfriend but i keep him out of stuff cause
he wants his personal life as private as u CAN make it while living with me
;) pretty darn difficult to do really! so i have to try to make sure the cam
is not pointing at him much, and with 4 cams plus streaming going on 24/7
that is a ballet dance to be sure! how far would i go with business? as far
as it's FUN to go. like i sell my paintings. i'd like to start making t shirts
again when i get the $$ to make some. there's a whole bunch of little fun
merchandise things i'd like to make cause i think it's be fun :) but i just
don't have the extra cash to make these things right now. but i'm trying to
save up a bit each month for it. blah blah blah. well, i just woke up and
this was my first thing i did today, and now my adrenalin is all going. :)
so now i'm gonna go eat something then read the rest of these posts. i'm in
typing mania mode lately.
--------------------
here's a damn long one!
Posted by ANA on October 12, 1999 at 20:19:00:
hi! my craving for sugar is insane!! if there was a cartoon about it there
would be little floating bottles of dr. pepper doing a "ring around the rosy"
around my head and i'd be drooling like homer simpson. ack. i didn't know
i was THIS addicted to sugar..or something. all day i sat with 4 quarters
in my hand just ready to go out and get a pop ( ya, soda for those of u who
don't use the word "pop" ya, i'm from minnesota...la de da!)
i had such an awful headache that woke me up this morning. first i took aspirin, that didn't work, so i took tylenol, that didn't work, so i took midrin, that didn't work..then finally, with the four quarters in my hand i was like fuck it i'm getting a coke...then i said take an excedrin! so i just took one 'cause the caffeine in two of them is too much for me and thank gofd my headache finally went away! so ...it just made it a shitty day not having any pop. i can't believe my whole day was wrecked because of that. i mulled around like a discontent sulky despondant animal of some sort. getting really irritated and stupid people in IRC, so finally i just had to BREAK FREE of irc and go sit in the sun on the couch. the sun only hits the couch when winter is here, which is good, 'cause that's when i WANT the sun 2 hit the couch :)
i wanted to go outside again today but i just didn't. i don't know what is my deal. i guess i just feel like such a slob and that i have to be somewhat presentable to go outside. which is really ludicrous cause here u all are watching me be a slob.
i just burned my arm cause i was frying up some fish with butter and the hot boiling butter splatted on me. owie :( i put some honey on it cause i read somewhere that honey is good for burns. i don't know why that is tho.
right now is the first good mood i've been in all day. i was just telling jason my flyng dreams. i never used to have flying dreams but now i'm starting to. and i'm getting a bit better at controlling the flying each time :) i just spent so much energy telling jason about my dream that now i don't have the energy to type it all out. that is one of the reasons i like to talk to everyone "en masse" cause i just want to say things once then never again. but if u met me in person you'd know that i do say the same things over and over again. but i'm trying 2 think of what i repeat over and over...oh man, that is WAY too big of a subject to delve into right now so i'll leave it at that!
oh! new anapix are up. i've decided 2 update anapix every monday now instead of saturday. cause tuesdays are busiest traffic days ( i have no idea why ) and saturdays are my lowest. so i don't want to say "new anapix up" in my caption on the day the least amount of people are watching.
honey is dripping off my arm and the house smells like fried fish.
i really hate preparing any sort of meat cause it stinks up the house. i never realized i disliked it so much until now that i'm on this all protein thing. i want a coke nowwwwwwwwwww.
so my airplane tickets are being bought! i'm leaving on sunday morning to go to jennifer from jennicam's party that she humously calls "jennicon" :) i am REALLY excited to see her again, because the only time i ever saw her was when i was on tour and i played in washington d.c. and she said "hey we should hook up!" but she didn't make it to my show cause she had to bring someone to the airport so i saw her after my show which was around midnightish. and she drove over to my hotel with he boyfriend , geofrey and i was sloshed on goldenschlager which is this yummy liquor with real gold flakes in it! plus i was all jacked cause it was after my show and it was the last night of a very stressful tour so i was gonna drink! and i was all silvery and glittery and painted on. and when u meet me at first..well, when u meet me anytime..i talk like jennifer tilly on speed...so it's a good thing i'm slowed down for digestion on your 33.6 modems! so i'm talking 500 miles an hour about all my grand "visions" for the camworld and what not and i spilled goldenschlager all over her and she got a rash from it! and then i saw months later on one of her jennishows that she had done an impression of me drunk ! ( which was a terrible but funny impression and i told her that..i was like hey! i wasn't THAT drunk! ) so anyway...i'm excited to meet her and give her a better impression :) but u know..i'll probably be super jacked when i get there and a mile a minute again. oh well. i am me. what can i do? i'm a little tiny weird faerie girl freak with weird hair and glitter. it's what i do best :)
so anyway, i'm not sure how i'll get connected to the net while i'm over there. she is bringing her cam too and she has a hub...but she uses macintosh and i'm PC. so i don't know how that werks. maybe my cell modem will work there, but i don't know if it's in the boundries that i'm alloted to roam without getting damn expensive. if all else fails i'll hook my laptop up to the phone line every so often and send a picture out. but i will for SURE being grabbing pictures from my laptop and saving them to my harddrive and i'l make a wicked big anagram from it :) jennicam on anacam and vice versa! how cool! plus i wanna take pix of jenni with "anacam vision" way :)
THEN, on tuesday i leave from there to NYC where i'll be "interviewing" tori amos on wednesday!!!! and my laptop works from NYC, no problem! and today i found out that it will be a chat with tori more than an interview..that she will ask me questions back and stuff...so i feel a HUGE weight lifted from me and now i don't have to make sure all my questions are "really really really really GOOD ones"!!! if we are going to have a conversation instead of an interview..well, that is a big difference! so i just feel a LOT better! but i'm still really nervous cause when i'm nervous i talk so fast and my voice is rather high..i hope that the microphones wil pick me up well and that when put through a 33.6 modem through tinny computers speakrs you'll actually be able to discern what i'm saying!
the only person who can really decipher my "ana-speek" at al times is my best friend carolyn, who is/was the bassist of the band The Blue Up? , my band for 11 years. i just emailed renee, the drummer, yesterday and i hope we can all get back together soon for wine and catching up stories. we might even reform in some fashion but not to play live i don't think. just to go do weird cover songs and stuff for our own amusement. 1/2 of our practicing was talking :) we had this GREAT cover of kate bush's "army dreamers" that we were working on where we all sat in a circle with one drum in the middle, then we both had two wooden stirring spoons and a big metal pan cover on our heads and we did this little choreographed rhythum thing with that. it was THE best. but we never got it really down pat cause we'd end up laughing so much. but i'd like to go back to that and figure it out :) maybe then we could play it for u on the net :)
so....i'll be having a conversation with tori on wednesday..so be sure to tune in and see the pictures of it happening! then later on you'll be able to see/hear the whole thing after they've done some production and editing to it :) and the premiere of that will be on a new site tori is starting at www.toriamos.com instead of www.tori.com i asked them what the difference between the two sites will be and it sounded like toriamos.com will just have MORE stuff.
i told the guy i've been talking to who is setting this whole thing up that tori should get a "piano cam". so i'll have to tell her that. or she should just put a gnome or something in her yard and point the cam at that so when she's away she can check up on the level of grass in the yard or what the sky looks like there and stuff :) don't u think there should be a "tori herb garden cam"? or "watch the dust settle on my home piano while i'm away" cam? then if she has a housekeeper or friend who watches over the house while she's away she can have that person write messages to her in dust on the piano. :)
that was the motto of "ANA" when i thought ANA was going to be the name of my band and not the name of me...it was "musique pour l'ecriture du la fin du temps" or something. ack, that's not it. what it's supposed to say is "music for writing in dust at the end of time" i have a big thing for writing secret messages in dust :) so....then i'll be home thursday night.
i wish i had the money to stay in NYC longer but i'm sure after 5 days i'll be dying to get home and see jason and the pupster dogs! i gotta get him a salami sandwhich from the carnegie deli and bring it back to him. he has never eaten there and i keep telling him about it and he keeps "pu-shawing" my love for that place 'cause he is supposed to know about delis not i, 'cause he's the jewish one :) but carnegie deli kicks ass! mmmm, potato pancakes! mmmm mish mash soup! how could u eat only protein the rest of your life??? mmmm. *drool* cheescake *slobber* :) i don't know if i'l be even anywhere near the carnegie deli, but if i am that'd be nice cause it's the only area of NYC that i'm even remotely familiar with. i've never even been to a club in nyc! it's always "wham bam thank u maam" when i go to NYC..or anywhere for that matter when i'm out on business...which is the only time i'm ever out. not like talking with tori is business! but u know what i mean...i'm not paying for it! so i gotta leave when they tell me to!
last time i was in NYC i stayed at the paramount, that's a cool hotel! i was there because i was flown out for some weird yahoo party that i never even got to partake in. my label just took me over and i was introduced to a ton of people and a bunch of people took my picture and asked me questions but i have no idea if any of them ever made it into a magazine. but i was pissed because the jesus and mary chain were playing at that party and i didn't even get to stay and watch! then i was taken out to dinner and i got in a fight wit gary kurfirst, the president of radioactive, the label i was on then. and that's the last i ever saw or spoke with that man, thank god. sometimes i think about about emailing him out of the blue and just saying " WHAT THE FUCKING HELL????? do u even KNOW what psychological torture u put me through ASSHOLE???" *sigh*
so..backing up a bit. that night at the yahoo thing i wore that t shirt that i had inscribed in black permanent marker "yes, they're fake" across my chest. and then i had such a rotten time even though i was in NYC at the paramount i wanted to fly right away home. so i got an earlier flight. but that flight was fuct so it looked like i was going to be stuck at the airport all night long waiting for the next day's plane...but then they found another plane and so we got to leave but when we were switching planes a woman from the new york times saw my "yes, they're fake" shirt and interviewed me on the way home because she just had gotten her job and her first piece to write on was the resurrgence of the popularity of implants. i mean, what are the chances??? and we talked about the desert in new mexico too, about how there is this one place out there that is so silent your can hear the wings of birds when they fly over your head! i want to go there... i need to....
ok, much time has passed, the pupsters had a furious fur flying frenzy and i got spooned on the couch, so i'll send this off...but until i tell u the one thing , the reason i started writing this whole thing!
ok..the thing is that i've come up with a fun game for the sleep station participants to do! and i'll cute and paste what i wrote to them here, on the sleep station mailing list that is only for those who sleep on the sleep station ( www.sleepstation.com ) if, you'd like to participate drop me a line to: sleepstation@hotmail.com )
hey, i have a fun idea of a game we could play with the sleep station! i had the idea when i saw www.tiberiusmaximus.com's cam on the sleep station for the last serveral days and he had one big word in his caption, a different word each night. like one night he wrote" virgin", and i was right next to him on the station and i thought of writing in a big word "mary" or something....but i didn't feel like doing it that night cause i thought it's be a whole lot more fun if we did it together. like the first person on the station puts up a word, then the next person on adds to it..until we finally have a sentence! it can be a silly nonsense sentence, it will probably end up VERY silly as people wake up and leave and certain words are deleted. :) everyone doesn't have to participate, but those that do, it could be really fun and surreal to see what kinds of sentences get formed as words pop in and out of the station :) i would say it'd be cool to keep the font "arial" to do it, and maybe pick a font size that we all use, i dunno...that's an idea just thrown out there. we don't HAVE to use the same font and size. i just thought that by doing that people would make the connection that we ARE trying to do the words together :) it seems that arial bold size 36 is the most visible ( unfortunately i know that's super big! ) what are your thoughts on this? oh and, tiberius.....what WERE you doing on the sleep station wearing a pig mask with the big word BASTARD across your cam? lol :) that was super funny , but u can't have been sleeping in that mask, were u? oh! which brings up the thought that perhaps we should just use "happy" words since the sleep station is about peace :) but i'm open to all ideas :)
--------
then here is another from the list that i wrote:
well, when it i went 2 sleep, the first words i saw were "music" then "left" so i wrote "me" ( how appropriiate! lol ;) thinking that the next person could write "hypnotized" or "sad" or "breathless" or "feeling" or "mysitified" etcetcetc then i woke up today with a terrible headache ( had it all yesterday , too ) at 8am..i am going to go back 2 sleep i hope cause i hate being up at this ungodly hour! :) well, right now the station says me constipated ( pig bastards vile contribution? but yet aprropriate because i AM constipated! i know i know too much information, tfs lol ;) erect sleep stop spirit being superloved !! hehe :) interesting 2 say the least! what did it say before u went to bed? i will include on the sleep station page an explanation of our game, and also an explanation of the sleep station itself :) thank u everyone for the banners they made! supercool :) i WILL get off my ass and make more!
oh and btw, everyone check out www.planetconcrete.com's new design! ( he's the one who wrote the word "being" :) so cool! i am jealous! i have to sharpen up my webmaking skills! and who are the three more people added to your site now, eric? roomates? who's the nifty girl in the blue wig? :)
ok, i'm gonna go watch cartoons in bed now, and i took some midrin for my head, and hopefully i'll start feeling better and drift back 2 sleep oh, and i have an idea of how we will not run out of room on the station , but jason has to make the programme to make it happen, and he is BEYOND super busy right now! but the idea of mine is that there be only 10 cams per page ( for quicker loading ) and that i then add more pages..and the programme will revolve through these pages each time it refreshes. that way everyone gets to be the "first page" depending on which page comes up first for the person tuning in to watch. and if they stay there and watched for awhile, they'd eventually see everyone without having to click through all the pages :)
----------------------
and i wrote this:
ok, i've been in a quandry about when tiberius puts a "disturbing" word in his caption while on the sleep station. because it goes against my original idea that i want the sleep station to be about peace. i want when people go there to feel calm and happy and i want to be able to look over while i'm sleeping at the fellow sleepers and feel happy, like a slumber party. tiberius, i truly do like your site. and u are a good and ardant sleeper, but i have 2 say that i don't think the sleep station is an appropriate place for big gigantic words that everyone cn read from the sleep station that are disturbing. if you'd like to put a "disturbing" word into your caption, i suggest you make it small enough that it is unreadable from the station. god, i feel so unliberal now! i know "disturbing" is different according to each individual. and i do not mean to step on anyone's self expression.
i put disturbing words in my caption a lot, but not when i'm sleeping. or if i did put a disturbing word in i wouldn't click into the station, since the station is a peaceful place. that was my intent. i never thought i problem like this would arise so..this is odd for me to talk about! i hope you are not mad and continue to sleep on the station. perhaps when you are only in the mood to put undisturbing words into the caption you'd like to sleep on the station? u can still use dark, sad, or melancholy words like "blood" or "rip" or "suck" although "suck would be a tough call. because all those words can also be "good". but stuff like "bastard" and "constipation" and i forgot now the other word u use the other day...once u used "virgin" and that was fine.
what am i now? the word police? LOL :) i guess we'll have 2 take it word for word. and make a list of certain words that are not "good" like "kill" or "hate" or "whore" although i personally have used all those words in captions a lot, i wouldn't use them on the sleep station because it's not "peaceful" of course "death" could be good or bad. death IS the ultimate sleep and/or peace?
so..i am now laying down another rule cause i'm making this up as i go along... just whenever u log onto the station...let it be your intent to create more peace and calmness and playfulness :) ( ya, i know the pig mask was playful...and u can wear the pig mask to bed if u can breathe in it...but if u do pick a nice word like "fluffy" to go with that :) LOL :) actually i think the word fluffy with a pig mask would be much more hilarious and controversial and thought provoking than "bastard" but that's just my personal opinion.!
constipated isn't a "bad" word..it's just not a PEACEFUL word. LOL :) so...that is the new rule to keep the sleep station as much as possible with the purpose i intended it to be :) if u like, i can create a page JUST for "disturbed sleepers" then u can use whatever words u want. it could be the universal nightmare station :) i'd be totally up for that :) any thoughts on this?
--------
and i wrote this to the sleep station list to:
if you are in bed but cannot sleep, i think u should still be able to log on. of course, let's just take that case by case. i mean, u can't be in bed and be jumping around SUPER awake..but if u are laying there reading and trying to sleep, i think that would be fine :) u don't need to look peaceful when u sleep, my dreams are almost always nightmares despite the fact that i look peaceful. i mean, looking unpeaceful while sleeping is just different, to me, than writing "BASTARD" in huge letters across the cam pic. do u know what i mean?
because looking unpeaceful while sleeping is still sleeping, and i guess not LOOKING peaceful is not a crime...but because you're sleeping and it's non-intentional....i guess i'll say if it is your INTENT to do anything "disturbing" like writing "asshole" across you campic..that is an intentional thing to cause "unpeace" and that would not be cool. so..perhaps i need to define and redefine what the sleep station is about. it's cool that it's not definable exactly since each person is going to bring in their own special 'sleep experience" whether that be tossing and turning or sleeping like a log. so..ok, it's not TOTALLY about peace, but i DO know that it's not about doing anything intentional to TRY to bring "unpeace" does that make sense?
so writhe and look unpeaceful if u do...as long as you're sleeping :) because your intent was not to cause "unpeace" by looking unpeaceful as u were sleeping. ya, i guess the sleep station is about SLEEP, and whether or not that is a peaceful experience to the viewer or u, is up to the whoever. but i will say that the GAME is about peace? how about that? sleep station is just about SLEEP, in whatever form and "the game" is about peace or other emotions that not "disturbing" do whatever u like...sleep with a fake corpse, throw blood on your sheets before u go to bed and pretend you've been killed. but just don't write a disturbing word that is really big in your caption. ok, i know that TOTALLY makes no sense. and is completely a paradox!!!! i could change my mind any minute! :)) i am working this out in my own head... any more questions?
oh, and i like patrick's bare
butt :) i think it totally rocks that he sleeps in the nude! woo hoo :)
-----------------
. :))) ok, time 2 go try to wind down to go into the bed and watch tv nite
nite, ana
-----------
here are some other random posts:
i'm not on any sugar! hence
my craving! :) carolyn and i loathe playing live..in a club, so i just don't
think that is gonna happen. but we could do a thing for the net. as in, there
is no show for an audience sitting right in front of us we put on a show only
for people watching us at the computer. but let's just see if we even get
as far as getting a practice space :) practice space is expensive and we used
to pay for it by playing live. a catch 22. so..this will most likely evolve
slowly :)
---------
that's what i sed ed :) play on the net! LOL :) but no friends in the physical audience! only friends watching from the computer. see? that way no one is getting an "exclusive" cause EVERYONE seees it online from the same view. no bad seats. no "oh, i wish i was there, too" because u ARE "there" get it? :) and i ain't playin no GEE-tar live NO MO!
-------
(about deiter eating the cap
off my lotion)
ah! i KNOW! it was a bottle of lotion!!! he ate the cap right of!!! argh.
he does this all the time which is why i he doesn't have free range of the
house and why i have to lock him up in the kitchen at night when we sleep.
if he'd just stop chewing stuff while i'm out of the room then things would
be better! it has to have something to do with us being out of the room, because
the second i leave he starts destroying stuff MORE than if i am in the room
------------
(an email to ben greenman)
HERE IS A LINK TO
A WONDERFUL THING BEN GREENMAN WROTE
that is SO great!!! i am going to put that url in my caption :) and send that off to my mailing list :) i don't really like the streaming yet, so it's sits there in the corner and i think about it once in awhile and go hmmmmm. but it's fun to watch the dogs freak out on the streaming :) but i'm figuring out how to save some of the streaming stuff then edit it and put it in anagrams for people to watch. i just need a good programme that converts avi. to mpeg. i don't do "shows" . i'm not inspired to do stuff like that. but i do like to do little ten second long weird mini mini movies. so, i think it'll be cool to add those into anagrams soon. it's just so much to keep track of..4 pictures plus streaming then one more picture on anacam. but if i had MORE cams going at once it'd be ok, cause just the sheer volumne of it would be hilarious. i just like to pay attention to one cam at a time. i'm working with it and pondering it whether it fits in to stuff. if it had sound tho, i'd MUCH prefer that. in fact, i think i might prefer JUST sound instead of streaming vid if i had to make a choice.] wish i could have both but can't afford that yet. but when i turn off the streaming i can have sound, and i'm thinking of reading bedtime stories at night to everyone :) i need more computers! more phone lines! aaa! i am meeting jennifer from jennicam sunday afternoon-tueday morning, so go watch jennicam on anacam and vice versa. did i tell u that? i wish i could speak in complete paragraphs! i wish i could type.
i think i need to get outside....
oh! speaking of which, i realized after u left that i ALWAYS made little "worlds" "countries" "clubs" ever since i can remember. i'd make the flag and the alphabet ( secret code ) and symbols and everything. but i never could get anyone involved with them. but it's something i always loved to do. build dollhousees and things. and i always played alone cause i prefered it that way. so...i don't think that because people bug me in the street is why i have my little "anaverse" online. i'm sure i would have done that anyway :) BUT, i WOULD go out more if people didn't bug me and stare at me so anyway, once i realized that i wasn't making my "anaverse" to escape and that it was in me from the beginning all along and i just love to do it, i felt better :) that i wasn't doing my anacam thing as some sort of escape from "reality"
-------------
so...that is some of the stuff i'm up to as u watch my staring down at my keyboard or staring at the monitor all day long! ack, i'm hyper!! either super tired or super hyper