anagram050100
(it'll take a bit to load this one )

for the short, sweet and simple updates on what is new that you would be interested to know, go to :
what's new?

 





what i wrote in my "read my mind section" today

Monday, May 1st, 2000

11:31 pm just sent off a new mailing list message which is pretty much just a quick summary of what is in here and what is in the analogs for the last few weeks. now i'm going to make a new anagram and a new analog. my body hurts with a dull pain from the waist up. jason is asleep. the dogs are asleep too. it's time for a fresca

10:06 pm one of the hard parts about having a site so large as mine in sheer amount of html files and pictures is knowing what to call all the folders and files and such so i do not get lost. so, i renamed almost everything in the book section for myself, so i could get a grasp on it better. that took awhile, but better to do it now while that section is still smallish. so on ana2, i have jut added another page to that section that consists of scans of journal 1. now i am going to do scans of journal2, and also take more echincea 'cause i'm not feeling well yet. i just haven't gotten back to "my old self" ever since i was sick those last few weeks.

8:43 pm i'm scanning drawing that are inside of my journals. jason is watching some weird made tv movie called "arabian nights" the make up in it is very cool! u just let deiyer run in the hallway, he was being such a spaz, and the hallway smelled so yummy with someone making spagetti or something. god, i'm starving now. i have 2 go look for food!

8:09 pm wow, i went into the thing room in search os photos 2 scan in with my journal entries and i got wayyyyy lost in them, and i'm not even 1/2 way looking through them. all the photos i have...so many. pictures of me and my mother pretending 2 milk a 50 feet high fiberglass cow somewhere in north dakota...the hilariously terrible polaroid of me with bryan ferry...so much...so many hair styles! ah, i have a headache and my back hurts, too. i'm gonna take some aspirin. it's so hot in hrere, no air circuulation...deiter is running around the room like an electrified piglet.

7:30 pm i'm scanning the cover of my 1st journal and my 2nd journal for the book section of ana2. someday i'll scan in all my photos from that time, too ( to ana2 ), and add them so you'll get a visual of what i'm saying and who i'm writing about and stuff. should probably get all those photos out NOW and scan them as i go along or might never get the task done of adding pictures 2 all the pages.

7:20 pm i just ate a very large tomato and ate 60 mg of echinacea. i hope that'll keep away the bogey man of rundowness. it was cool to see the tomoato on the bigcam5 680 pixels of pure tomato. i'm going 2 go on a search for the next journal i will type out. i have to keep on that. i didn't make it outside, but i did get a lot done. i feel happy. one of the things i hate about minnesota is that when the weather gets nice i feel OBLIGATED to go outside becaues there are so few nice days. i need to live somewhere where it's always nice out so i can go outside when i feel like any time of the year.

6:56 pm oh, and the tai chi workout for beginners, i need that , too....

6:55 pm wow, they have lots of cool stuff for sale at http://shopping.discovery.com i wnat the video about stress relief yoga for beginners, and energy chi for beginners. i know i can learn a lot better from videos that books when it comes to things like that. maybe i could find a video on how to crochet and how to sign language!

6:51 pm argh. thete was a show on animal planet channel ( http://apl.discovery.com) called Breed About It All, and the topic was Japanese Chins ( the breed of my dogs, pooka and deiter ) and i missed it! there is so little written about this breed! it says on their webpage they ae going 2 repeat that show on may 27th at 10:30 PST. I CAN'T MISS IT!!!! i wish they sold tapes of that show because i'd really like that! argh! it saus on their webpage that japanese chins originally cam efrom china and that the japanese bread then with toy spaniels to create their version of the breed. so thequestion is this: WHAT breed did they breed with the toy spaniels?? what is it called ? is it pekinese??? aaa! i want 2 know!
)
6:39 pm scott bateman ( www.batemania.com ) has added musiq to his ana-mation ( samples from my voice he remixed and stuff ) go here 2 see/hear it ( it uses the realplayer) http://www.batemania.com/animation/films/testfilm.rm


Monday, May 1st, 2000
6:08 pm added a link to other cams in the menu of ana2, click on "other cams" in the menu. i found out you can put tables within tables. i didn't know that before. does anyone know how to put an html page WITHIN another html page, in the same way that u can put an image into an html page? because i need to figure out how to do that. and i need to be able to set how BIG the html page will appear in it. and i would like to figure out how to make a tiny version of this livejournal, so small that i could make a remote for it, does anyone know how to do that? jason just came home,. the dogs are spinning 'cause they know they'll get treats. ok, NOW i must get food. i'll see if jason wants to get some with me...

5:38 pm ok, i didn't leave yet. i put up the "book" section" into anacam. so click on "book" in the menu if u are interested in reading it.

5:22 pm ok, i registered my aloecam for 30 bucks. and i wrote a check for 384.00 to janey for their webservice. i have been really really bad at keeping track of my finances again. as u can tell i have not been writing that down in my analogs what i've been spending or getting. perhaps havng this place that ftps stuff up immediately with no effort by be, i can keep everyone up to date on that, which keeps me up to date. i bounced about 5 checks last month and i don't even know which ones, i haven't been in the frame of mind to deal with it. there are a bunch more bills to pay but i have tio go find them in the midst of all my piles of papers. it's all in the hallway. i bought 5 big plastic bozes to put my paper stuff in all sorted. now i just have to sort it. i have it 1/2 sorted but the bill section is not sorted. holy blarg. if i could just get EVERYTHING organized in my house i think it will be the second coming of jesus christ. i have put everything to do with the "unvalentines" int one of those big plastic boxes. as i wqas going through the thing room i found lots of cool bits of paper stuff to add to the envelopes. i save all these little things i find until someday i have a use for them. i haven't sent the unvaelentines out yet because i don't think they are good enough to send out, but now with my new accumulation to stuff the envelopes with , i think it will be nice. i just couldn't even GET into the thing room to get things because that is how crammed it was. but that 1/2 the contents of the thing room are in the hallway, i can get in there...so....since i have not sent them off yet, if u are an ana2 member and u don't think you've given me your address yet ( your SNAIL MAIL addy ) and u would like me to send u an "unvalentine" write to me and tell me your username and password so i know that u are an ana2 member and tell me what address to send one to u, and my email address for that is listed on the menu of ana2, right below that picture of me. *whew* i splashed off with some water and got dressed now and tried to cover up all my zits to no avail, and i've writtenthe cheque out to janey and put it in an envelope, so now i'm going to go outside to mail that nad get some food and beverages that i need very much!

Monday, May 1st, 2000
4:11 pm not "stranhe", STRANGE. i am the queen of typos. i can't even tell u how many times i've typed "mailing lust" instea of "mailing list"! :) my fern is dying. i am so bad at keeping plants alive. i don't know why that is. :( both of my parents are SO good at growing plants. i do have some cacti, tho, that seem to be hanging in there...i have no clue if anyone is enjoying my "anacam retrospective" no one has said much about that. but at least i am having fun watching all the old pictures! ok, i gotta get dressed and get outside because there is no food here and there is no carbonated beverages, and i need that to survive. i need jason to help me get my extensions out of my head because they are getting all frazzled and gross. then i'm gonna get new ones at some point. all white ones like i was supposed to get last time. they finally have white in. that's at the robert james salon downtown , minneapolis, in case u were wondering where i get my extensions done. i wish the hair on the sides of my head was long enough to put extensions in.

3:50 pm oh, wait, i figured it out. duh. it's 70 degrees outside. i'm insane if i don't go out in it. but i am prone to insanity :) i am out of carbonated beverages and that alone is enough to make me get outside because i am addicted to carbonation. i have to have that fizz when i wake up. ooo, so refeshing :) my dreams are stuck in my head and i don't even want 2 tell u what they were because they are far too icky. dreams, please get out of my head. ick. ick. ick. i am thinking of making my "book" section which i will rename soon "diary of a stranhe girl" , i think, to anacam, because i think it could possibly be of interest to a lot of women who have been in abusive relationships because u can see how utterly stupid i was , yet i am a smart person...yet i stayed in these horrible relationships, and i can see the whole bizarre process in my journals from then ( 1990 ). it really shocking for me to reread them and type them out because i can't believe i was that fucked up.

3:40 pm ok, i've decided this one is the primary one 'cause i'm not switching all my links AGAIN. man oh man! i'm just sad 'cause when i made this journal i chose the option to not be listed in their directory, but now i do want to be listed. i dunno how to undo that.

3:34 pm well, my "anavoog" journal is working again. so now i am torn between moving back to that one as being my primary journal, but now i've told everyone to switchg to this one. although only 1/2 of th epeople switched the other half are still at anavoog. i dunno. it's too much for me to deal with right as i wake up. so for now i have both, and i don't know what i'm going to do. blarg.

2:48 pm errr....my computer was on 1999 again. the dogs just tipped over my cam corder, i hope they didn't bust that one too :( it looks like a gorgeous day outside...i wonder if i'll make it outside today?


Monday, May 1st, 2000
2:25 am before homecams went down, i grabbed all the url to all the cams they had collected, and now i have put the urls on my site so that u may still know of them. many of these cam smight now be around anymore or have perhaps switched urls. and there have been many cam sarising that are not listed in this list. if u find any dead links, let me know, and i'll remove them, and if u have any cams you'd like to add, email me at anamothership@hotmail.com i hope u will enjoy perusing all of the cams listed...here is the url to the directory: www.anacam.com/cams

1:24 am ah, old black and white cartoons are on the cartoon channel . i LOVE those!!!! happiness :)

1:14 am ok, i have finished typing out journal #1 091388-061190 tomorrow i will start typing out the 2nd one. i have ne last alcoholic lemonade left. i'll drink that, eat some yummy cold left over pizza then crawl into to bed 2 fall asleep to a movie, perhaps. goodnight my sweets :)

1:03 am ok, page 11 added 2 the "book" section of ana2. I hope i don't dream about what i just typed all evening. wow, 1990 was one freaky year...

Sunday, April 30th, 2000
11:00 pm i am still typing ou my old journals from 1990. they are so intense. it is freaky to reread them! i am drinking "mike's hard lemonade" in hopes to kake myself tired. i went to sleep 3 hours earlier last night ( 4am ) and i'm going to strive for earlier tonight. jerry springer is on space ghost

9:27 pm oops, it's the year 2000, not 1999 :) i had my computer set to 1999 'cause i do that if i want to open up my livegrab. i'm typing out old journals.

6:31 pm hi, this is my NEW live journal with the username of "ana" instead of "anavoog". my anavoog one mysteriously stopped working! so if u have listed in my in your friends section, please delete "anavoog" and replace it with "ana" and to let u know, there is a new mp3 of mine to download in anamusiq! there is also a new nanagram up in ana2 and a new analog on anacam. and i have added pages 9 and 10 to the book section of ana2 and i am going to be adding more pages to that tonight :)


Sunday, April 30th, 2000
12:45 pm yay, i woke up 3 hours earlier today then yesterday :) i feel a bit hungover, tho :/ jason is watching "frightnight" i took and excedrin, i think i'll feel better in about an hour then hopefully today i'll get out 4 a walk :)

2:27 am ok, made a new analog for anacam, and made a new anagram for ana2. now i'm gonna go 2 sleep 'cause i promised myself i'd go 2 bed at 2am, and it's past that now

1:50 am ok, page nine added to "book" on ana2. i can't type anymore for i can't type anyway, but i certainly can't type while tipsy! hopefully i can still read it with all the typos! it is very interesting 2 read my old journals....the same themes keep popping up in my life time after time!
---------
messages i posted to the bbs:
Posted by ANA on May 01, 2000 at 14:00:12:

In Reply to: analog question posted by garbjrk on May 01, 2000 at 12:52:55:
ya, analogs are made up of posts i make in here, posts i make in under the ed, emails i send to my mailing list, and just a hodge podge of whatever i might write. but the analogs aren't always sent out to the mailing list. i haven't sent anything out to the mailing list in awhile because in my mailbox there rae always a ton of people to be subscribed and want to be unsubscribed but can't figure it out on there own how to do that task, and all this piles up in my mailbox for a long time sometimes because i don't feeel like doing that all , so i don't send a mailing list message out until i do it because then if someone who tried to unsubscribe, but didn't do it right...doesn't get unsubbed because they were stupid and they get another mailing list message from me, they freak out and make my life miserable.
yesterday i finally did do all the mailng lust admin, so there might be a new mailing list message today, but it'll probab;y be a short one 'cause i don't feel like riting abig one today..but all that could change in an hour.

oh, and everytime i send one off about 30 messages bounce back to me ( or more ) because that email is no longer there, or their mailbox is over quota. it's insane, the amount of work a mailing list is!

so i have to do all of these things before i can send a message out. but i've finally got caught up in all that admin for it for today.

but you could've been unsubsribed because peoples mailboxes bounce back to me all the time , and if they do, i unsub them.
but check in this bbs later to see if i sent a mailing list message out, or check out "click my brain?, and if u se that i've sent one and u didn't get it, go resubscribe.

wow, long answer that was.
---------
Posted by ANA on May 01, 2000 at 21:04:35:

In Reply to: OUIJA Board posted by TredBurt on May 01, 2000 at 19:15:10:
ouiji boards do work. but DO not do it unless u are TOTALLY understanding of the power of it. it is not to be taken lightly! there are a lot of "spirits" in that "realm" who are very "unenlightened" and when u tap into that realm with them in it, it's kind of like the equivelent of ringing up a nightmarish frat party of stupid drunk idiots who just want to fuck with your mind for awhile. and if u open up that portal they sometimes stay in your house fucking stuff up because they are quite mean and vindictive because they must be pretty bored over there or something.
you have to call upon something SPECIFIC so it's basically not like going enee meeno minee mo, and putting your finger into the yellow pages and dialing whatever it is your finger blindly lands on.
and u must ground yourself and protect your space.

on the other hand, some very good things have come about from ouihi boards, most namely, all the Seth books by jane roberts which have been an invaluable source of information to me :)
-------------------


excerpt from 050100 mailing list message


other new things are , i have finally started typing out ( with three fingers )my journals starting in 1988 and u can go read what i've typed out so far in the "book" section of the anacam or ana2 menu.
the ana2 section has pictures and scans from the journal itself whereas the anacam version is the typed text alone.
i was going to keeo this "book" section only on ana2, because it is so greatly detailed and personal that i didn't know if i could mentally handle sharing it with everyone, but now that i'm typing it out, i think it might be a very helpful thing to some people---especially women who have been in abusive relationships because u can see what i'm writing as i'm right in the middle of one and see how smart women can indeed do some very stupid things. i can't believe how fucked up i was back then and the rationalizations i would come up for staying with this guy who was physically and verbally abusive.

if i actually get ALL my journals typed out and the the photos scanned that go with ( it'l take me years ), it's going to be quite a feat! and i'm really energized about this and i hope i can keep going with it because it is a healing thing for me, too...to see from some distance why i did the things i did back then. u can't really see the whole picture when you're in the midst of it.

thank u everyone for all your birthday messages u sent me!!!!! it made me smile and smile and feel so very loved :) thank u thank u thank u :))))))))
and for those who sent me birthday presents, THANK u!!!! i will be sending u thank u notes in the mail ! but u know how i am awful when it comes to snail mail, so it might be awhile, but you WILL get them!!!

oh, i know another new thing..on ana2...bigcam4...a gigantic 680 pixel cam. mongo big! it's fun playing around with that :)
and i have my headset microphone connected in now and my realpublisher configured so i'll be talking to u in SOUND sometimes now when i get to feeling really talkative. i'll put the url up of where to hear that when i am doing it.

and i bought some strawberries today! STRAWBERRIES! spring is here nad the leaves are finally starting to poke out their little heads on the trees here, and jason bought me a honda scooter for my birthday! A SCOOTER! can u believe????
so i gotta figure out a way to bring my mobile cam on that!

does anyone know where i can buy a REALLY COOL GLITTERY HELMET for when i ride my scooter???


peas and broken mirror fragments making the light dance at weird angles,
ana