anagram 04.14.99

today my other goldfish died. the black one. makes me sad. this whole time I was looking for a place 2 put this goldfish, an aquarium somewhere. I kept hoping I'd run into one. then, as fate would have it, just hours after it's death…I found an aquarium with goldfish in it at a chinese restaurant. I was so bummed. if would've known I would've brought my fish in there and secretly slipped it in there. then I noticed that there wasn't any access into the aquarium, so I decided what I WOULD'VE done, if I had known about this aquarium when my fish was alive…is that I would've gone in there and seated myself by the aquarium, then I would've put my fish on the table next to it…flipping it's little flippers. then I would've screamed and gotten a waitress and told her that a goldfish jumped out of the aquarium on onto my table! they would HAVE to put it back in the aquarium because they would be so confused. even though it would've been impossible for that fish to have actually jumped out, they'd have to believe that it had…because to believe that a girl brought it in from home and set it on the table screaming, just so her goldfish could live..would've been too preposterous. then my fish would've been happy, and I could've gone and visited it. if only I had known. dang.
I tried to take my cam with me outside the other day. but it wouldn't turn on. it was weird. it was like totally dead. hen the second I got home, it worked. I think maybe it was divine intervention telling me that I should not show even anywhere outside where I live, no matter how cool. which makes me sad, 'cause there's so much cool stuff around my house to take pictures of. but all I need is one stalker to make my life miserable. there is this one girl who frequents my public bbs a lot that just was arrested for stalking anthony keidis from the red hot chili peppers. she thought they had a telepathic link. but because he would not reciprocate her telepathy, she turned violent towards him. it's a fine line.
I'm chewing black jack gum. it's that black gum that tastes like licorice.
I bought david sylvian's new cd. but I haven't listened to it enough to tell what I think of it.
I have TOO much to do. too much to clean. so to avoid doing it I'm making an anagram and chatting in irc.
charity just got her cam up! it's at www.artelevision.com/charitycam
she makes yummy soap and lotion. all natural! I'm using peppermint tingle right now..and I gotta say it WAS a tingly experience using it to shave off all my pubic hair the other day! shaving "down there" is such a bitch. I just do it once in awhile 'cause I think it looks cool. it was the day I dyed my hair pink. I just wanted everything "brand new". I'm not sick of my pink hair yet. I sure I wish I had the patience inme to grow my hair out. but I always lose my mind in all those inbetween hair stages. then I end up hacking it or bleaching it. I want to grow it out to my butt, then braid it and pile the braids on top of my head and then make them stay up there with lots of chopsticks and stuff. my hair grows like one fourth of an inch a month, which is half the average. dunno why.
I finally saw the movie "titanic". it was on tv. it was pretty corny, which I knew it would be. the special effects were amazing. I liked it best when they showed the titanic underwater after all the years. I liked the few seconds that they showed the piano underwater all decayed. and I want to know how they did that. did they just stick a piano underwater for a few months and just let it rot or WHAT? I love decay. I love the patterns it makes. I love the cracks in the sidewalks. I love when nature starts eating away machinery. not because I dislike machinery, but because I love the combination of nature and machinery. I love rust, mold, water stains, cracks, peelings, dust. it's so delicate.
I met a guy when I was walking around the other day. I told u about how people just come up and talk to me. well, he just came up and sat right down next to me. this was right after my laptop died. his name was al and he was smelly but nice. he was looking for a wife. why he thought I would perhaps be a candidate, I have no clue! I mean, I'm sitting there in this weird way with pink hair and a laptop and wires and headphones and plastic bags and an egg salad sandwhich. I don't think I looked like wife material. but then I don't know what "wife material" would look like. he kept thinking I would be a good cook for some reason. the first thing he said to me is "do u know how to boil eggs?" which I replied "no", but of course I know, but I really was not in the mood for a conversation about boiling eggs at that moment. I wanted to just sit in the sun and get my laptop to work. I guess I will hand it to the guy for originality and trying. but dang, if u see a girl with HEADPHONES on, then you'd think that meant she did not want to talk.
btw, I was listening to u2's the joshua tree. I hadn't heard it in awhile. I just bought a cheap walkman the other day. I needed one so much. they are THE best things ever invented besides the computer.
my cool secret spot I've discovered is not so secret. all the bums go there to drink! I found a pile of apples there the other day, then they came back and started drinking. we looked at each other quizzically. I could not decide if I should be scared or not. then finally I got sick of trying to stay relaxed even though I was in a secluded spot with 2 guys drinking…so I left. I keep going back there and each day it's a new set of drinking bums. maybe I will start putting presents in their spot.
another thing I'm thinking of doing is making bottles with messages inside them and throwing them into the mississippi river. I just haven't figured out the ideal way to seal them. I'd like to use those arizona tea bottles 'cause they are so nice, but how should I seal them up? I don't know of a place that makes corks that'd fit them. and I don't want to have to drink a ton of wine to get a bottle with a cork. their has 2 b a better way. I want to let helium balloons go with messages attacjed, too. but people tell me that birds will try to eat them, then die. is this true? is it also true that birds will eat used chewing gum and die from that?
nowe it's 8pm and I have avoided cleaning. and I need to get back to typing out my journals. and I need to hook up the zip drive that sushuma gave me so I can get the voice recognition software on there and try that out!
morgaine, ee, and spiral gave me a lite brite for my birthday! so as soon as I get a 25 watt bulb 4 it, I'm gonna make cool stuff for the cam with it :)
zuma sent me some jack kerouack books that look really great! I have never read him! and dankitti sent me another tape of his music that I will listen to tonight :) and btripp sent me a big long thing on how to embed "sigils" into a picture. it has to do with magick. I dunno what or how I feel about that yet. I will ponder it.
jason is trying to get a stain out of the carpet. deiter chewed an inkpen. morgaine updated the pooka/deiter pages. go to: hello.to/pooka
I'm going to move my stuff out of the bedroom and into the "thing room", and move jason's stuff from the thing room to the bedroom. that way we will both have our own spaces to be private in. I need a little space where I can go to type my journals and paint and sew and stuff . so that is a big project that I do not look forward to, and I'm putting off everything because of it. I just want everything to b in order RIGHT NOW.
so when I get my creative space working, then I will have no excuse, I hope, to not get other things done. like sewing and painting and typing out my journals.
my manager, bobby z, and I got together the other day and he is going to bring my 4-track in to get fixed. it's been broken since last summer. it's a fostex and I've had it since 1982 or something. I wish I could find an 8 track just like it..but all the 8 tracks I ever see are so complex. I don't want complex., I just want a "record" button. then I might get back to writing songs and putting out singles here and there, in limited edition quantities. with hand made covers signed and numbered. I don't want to make another BIG record that will define me for the next 3 years. I don't want any hype. I just want to make silly goofy songs on my 4 track in the lowest fi way and put them out as cute singles. no big deal. no big marketing plan.
bobby still sees music as my # 1 career and life. but I am pretty happy right now not doing music. I am the sort of creative person that can work in a million different mediums and whichever one I end up doing satisfies me. the reason I chose the "popstar" medium, is not because I wanted to be a musician, but because I loved how it was so multimedia. I could have music, video, fashion, movies, tv, cover art, posters, cd roms, booklets, photos, set design…all wrapped up into one. but when I got into the major label part…all of those other departments got taken away from me mostly and I had no control, which really defeated the purpose of being multimedia for me. so now that I've found the cam, I feel very satsified with my creative output again, because I'm doing everything I want to do..and I see so much possibility for the future with online "sets" for concerts or a discussion or whatever. interactive THINGS.
speaking of that, a place www.xrave.com wants to collaborate with me in some way. go check them out and tell me if u can make it work on your computer. I wrote this in anarchy:
"this place called XRAVE wants me to do something with them. they are a virtual reality thing, so u have 2 have the plug in 2 see it.
go 2 their front page:
www.xrave.com
2 see what u need.
then after that , go here:
http://www.xrave.com/xrave/xravevt/demo/studio1.wrl
that is a room they are building for me if i should decide to do something with them. click on the kaleidoscope patterns u see, it's pretty cool!
u will need a username and password 2 get in.
don't give this out to anyone, ok?
username: anacam
password: truth
i just want 2 get your opinions on what u think of the place, and if u can actually get it working on your computer. please go there, try it out, and let me know what u think and and if it was working for u :)
i think what the deal is is i can get my cam in there, and have a chat, and we can all have avatarts and walk around..and i think we can have music, too.
but this might be something that could possibly be some sort of addition 2 ana2. maybe? i dunno!"

ok, that's all I can think of for now. that I can type out at least. oh, I had my 1st anacam related dream. it was only a few seconds long. I was just asking that guy in anarchy again "who is pam arcand?"